Cor, something I thought I'd never see on this site - a posting about the menopause!
Being of a certain age myself (ahem) I have been undergoing these symptoms myself for the last 3 years or so.
Everything just stopped suddenly and I started getting the hot flushes.
To be absolutely truthful, things haven't been so bad. The worst was when it first started and I got hot flushes standing at the check-out.
I then noticed that mine seemed to happen at certain times of the day, such as on waking, and came to expect it at those times. Sometimes they were enough to make me break out in a sweat, but mostly they passed by with little more than an acknowlegement they were happening.
It's gotten to the point now where I rarely have them and indeed that is the 'only' symptom of the menopause for me (apart from the obvious 'missing' element
I know I've been extremely lucky, I've not had to take anything and it's been relatively smooth for me. So, although I haven't been able to help you with your query, I just wanted people to know, just like childbirth, it isn't horrendous for everyone.