Put Downs from Teachers
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Road Runner
- Posts: 410
- Joined: Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:32 pm
Mel x
Hi Scathouse
Firstly I want to say ditto to everything said by other posters. Secondly I am sorry for you and your poor son who is as far as I am concerned being Bullied. You must definitely do something now.
I too had one similar experience when my son was in year 6. Ironically the school had just done a big 'anti bullying' campagne involving all the children and writing to all the parents telling us what to look out for etc etc.
Anyway When I noticed my son wasn't himsef one day, clearly upset about something I spoke with him and found out that his English teacher(also his form teacher) had humiliated him in front of his whole class. They had recently completed mock SATS and he hadn't scored aswell in English as she expected him to. She shouted at him infront of the whole class telling him how disappointed she was with him and that she would be having a meeting later that week about 'Sets' and she may even have him moved down a set. He was really embarrassed and told me she had actually brought him to tears.
Well obviously I was very upset and that night when I confided in my best friend she said her son(who was in the same class) had alos told her what had happened.
The very next day I called up the head leaving a message that I wanted to report bullying. I knew in light of recent campagne it would get her attention and it did. I haveto say she handled it immediately. The teacher in question was hauled in that same day and my son later rceieved an apology. He and we were told she held him in such high steem she had been disappointed with his result but hadn't meant to upset him. She also reassured him he would not be moving sets. When we saw her at a later parents evening she did again very sheepishly say she regretted how she'd upset him. I haveto say she was obviosuly very sorry and she seeemed to make an extra effort with him after that. I am glad we complained because it got sorted and it gave her a wake up call which she clearly needed.
You see I can understand her and alot of teachers wanting the best out of thier pupils but they mustn't forget these children are 'children'.
I think yours sons teacher sounds almost resentful of your sons ability. The chances are he has passed and she feels the need to keep him in his place. Is it possible he is one of only a very few who may have passed so again she doesn't want him to get 'too big for his boots!' You see I think there really are teachers and people in general that would respond this way to any child who passes just because they are jealous. Sounds very childish but true.
Please let us know how you get on and how your son does. when do you get the test result and is there a way you can find out??
Mel
Firstly I want to say ditto to everything said by other posters. Secondly I am sorry for you and your poor son who is as far as I am concerned being Bullied. You must definitely do something now.
I too had one similar experience when my son was in year 6. Ironically the school had just done a big 'anti bullying' campagne involving all the children and writing to all the parents telling us what to look out for etc etc.
Anyway When I noticed my son wasn't himsef one day, clearly upset about something I spoke with him and found out that his English teacher(also his form teacher) had humiliated him in front of his whole class. They had recently completed mock SATS and he hadn't scored aswell in English as she expected him to. She shouted at him infront of the whole class telling him how disappointed she was with him and that she would be having a meeting later that week about 'Sets' and she may even have him moved down a set. He was really embarrassed and told me she had actually brought him to tears.
Well obviously I was very upset and that night when I confided in my best friend she said her son(who was in the same class) had alos told her what had happened.
The very next day I called up the head leaving a message that I wanted to report bullying. I knew in light of recent campagne it would get her attention and it did. I haveto say she handled it immediately. The teacher in question was hauled in that same day and my son later rceieved an apology. He and we were told she held him in such high steem she had been disappointed with his result but hadn't meant to upset him. She also reassured him he would not be moving sets. When we saw her at a later parents evening she did again very sheepishly say she regretted how she'd upset him. I haveto say she was obviosuly very sorry and she seeemed to make an extra effort with him after that. I am glad we complained because it got sorted and it gave her a wake up call which she clearly needed.
You see I can understand her and alot of teachers wanting the best out of thier pupils but they mustn't forget these children are 'children'.
I think yours sons teacher sounds almost resentful of your sons ability. The chances are he has passed and she feels the need to keep him in his place. Is it possible he is one of only a very few who may have passed so again she doesn't want him to get 'too big for his boots!' You see I think there really are teachers and people in general that would respond this way to any child who passes just because they are jealous. Sounds very childish but true.
Please let us know how you get on and how your son does. when do you get the test result and is there a way you can find out??
Mel
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Road Runner
- Posts: 410
- Joined: Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:32 pm
Mel
Incidently Scathouse I too go through texts, emails etc etc.
keeping intouch with whats going on in our childrens life is good parenting in my book.
keeping intouch with whats going on in our childrens life is good parenting in my book.
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proud mum x2
- Posts: 609
- Joined: Mon Dec 31, 2007 7:35 pm
Mel, my daughter's teacher is just the same as the one you mention, always seems to want to put my daughter down,at every chance she gets.She once told me that my daughter is a leader....but that she needs to realize that not everyone is??? I was confused too! I think she meant that my daughter tends to "organize" groups etc,(she has been trying to organize us since she could walk! ) But she manages to do this with all her friends approval, she has a friend in each one of her classmates and I think the teacher is either jealous or feels threatened.She is the only one who passed for grammar, and I think the teacher would have preferred her to have failed. My daughter tells me that she knows the teacher doesn't like her, but, she says she doesn't mind,only 6 months to go.I think that is quite sad.She is fortunate to have had some great teachers up until now, in fact one of them,her y1 teacher from her previous school,is in frequent touch,and sent her a congrats card when she passed!
Hiya Scatshouse
Really sorry to read your post,it's awful that a teacher can say that,I just hope your son passes with flying colours so he can show the teacher in question how wrong they were!!
I'm fortuntate that my son's teacher never mentions the 11+ at all and I try to avoid all contact with the school,had too many promises of help for my very bored son broken!If you think it's less than 6 weeks till you know the outcome of the 11+ and it is wizzing by!
You are lucky that your kids tell you everything, both of mine do too and some times it makes you blood boil when you hear what is said to them!
I too go through my daughters texts on phone ,my son is'nt interested in texts or msn YET!
Anyway hope it works out and when you son passes you can give the school what it deserves NOTHING .
I often wonder why all Wirral primarys I hear about are so against the 11+
your's sounds worse than mine and I thought it was awful1
keep in touch Scatshouse,see you on the Wirral board
Pensby
Really sorry to read your post,it's awful that a teacher can say that,I just hope your son passes with flying colours so he can show the teacher in question how wrong they were!!
I'm fortuntate that my son's teacher never mentions the 11+ at all and I try to avoid all contact with the school,had too many promises of help for my very bored son broken!If you think it's less than 6 weeks till you know the outcome of the 11+ and it is wizzing by!
You are lucky that your kids tell you everything, both of mine do too and some times it makes you blood boil when you hear what is said to them!
I too go through my daughters texts on phone ,my son is'nt interested in texts or msn YET!
Anyway hope it works out and when you son passes you can give the school what it deserves NOTHING .
I often wonder why all Wirral primarys I hear about are so against the 11+
your's sounds worse than mine and I thought it was awful1
keep in touch Scatshouse,see you on the Wirral board
Pensby
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Appeal Mum
- Posts: 2049
- Joined: Fri Mar 09, 2007 10:29 pm
- Location: Wirral
Hi Scatshouse,
That behaviour is totally unacceptable!
It makes me wonder why these teachers took up teaching in the first place.
Talk about a few rotten apples spoiling the cart!
I do not believe a teacher would have used this type of put down if your child hadn't have passed. I really think its sour grapes and since they already have the results I would leave it at that.
I wouldn't however let her get away with these nasty, spiteful comments. Imagine the next child, they might not be as forthcoming as your son. I would take this to the Head teacher and if they seem unconcerned, take it to the board of governors.
I agree with Pensby in that Wirral needs to wake up and be proud of its grammar schools, instead of keeping everything swept under the carpet.
They are here and we should be proud of them!
Not long to go now..
Sending you and your son big hugs..
AM
That behaviour is totally unacceptable!
It makes me wonder why these teachers took up teaching in the first place.
Talk about a few rotten apples spoiling the cart!
When I read your post the above is what came to my mind too.I think yours sons teacher sounds almost resentful of your sons ability. The chances are he has passed and she feels the need to keep him in his place. Is it possible he is one of only a very few who may have passed so again she doesn't want him to get 'too big for his boots!' You see I think there really are teachers and people in general that would respond this way to any child who passes just because they are jealous. Sounds very childish but true.
I do not believe a teacher would have used this type of put down if your child hadn't have passed. I really think its sour grapes and since they already have the results I would leave it at that.
I wouldn't however let her get away with these nasty, spiteful comments. Imagine the next child, they might not be as forthcoming as your son. I would take this to the Head teacher and if they seem unconcerned, take it to the board of governors.
I agree with Pensby in that Wirral needs to wake up and be proud of its grammar schools, instead of keeping everything swept under the carpet.
They are here and we should be proud of them!
Not long to go now..
Sending you and your son big hugs..
AM
That is unforgivable....
I have known teachers who have done this sort of bullying , my own daughter suffered with a teacher who held the Kent test over them as an "incentive". but being told that 'nobody in this class will stand a chance in the Kent test' just made my bright but insecure daughter crumble.
with my other head as an ex senior teacher I would have been appalled to hear one of the staff making this sort of comment. Ask to speak to the head, be calm and collected , have the voice of reason on your side. Unfortunately there are still far to many teachers like this. They are a minority ,but they undermine the many excellent and caring primary teachers who make up the majority
I have known teachers who have done this sort of bullying , my own daughter suffered with a teacher who held the Kent test over them as an "incentive". but being told that 'nobody in this class will stand a chance in the Kent test' just made my bright but insecure daughter crumble.
with my other head as an ex senior teacher I would have been appalled to hear one of the staff making this sort of comment. Ask to speak to the head, be calm and collected , have the voice of reason on your side. Unfortunately there are still far to many teachers like this. They are a minority ,but they undermine the many excellent and caring primary teachers who make up the majority
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scatshouse
- Posts: 438
- Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2007 10:00 am
Hi all,
Just to update you on what's happened so far:
On Friday morning in the playground I asked a few children, independently, what they heard the teacher say to my son. (Just in the hope that he'd misheard). All of them said exactly the same as my son.
I then, against your advice I know
, asked the teacher concerned why she had said this. She flatly denied saying it!!
This morning I have spoken to the headmaster and he has promised to look into it. He did say that some teachers expect higher standards from certain children and I said that doesn't excuse what she said.
I'm not sure if I want to make it all official as I'm in a difficult situation because I'm a bit wary of upsetting the school as, if my son is borderline fail, I may need their support if we decide to appeal, and for all I know the Head may already have been asked for a review
I really don't want this to go against my son.
I'll let you know what the headmaster says as soon as I know.
Scatshouse.
Just to update you on what's happened so far:
On Friday morning in the playground I asked a few children, independently, what they heard the teacher say to my son. (Just in the hope that he'd misheard). All of them said exactly the same as my son.
I then, against your advice I know
, asked the teacher concerned why she had said this. She flatly denied saying it!! This morning I have spoken to the headmaster and he has promised to look into it. He did say that some teachers expect higher standards from certain children and I said that doesn't excuse what she said.
I'm not sure if I want to make it all official as I'm in a difficult situation because I'm a bit wary of upsetting the school as, if my son is borderline fail, I may need their support if we decide to appeal, and for all I know the Head may already have been asked for a review
I really don't want this to go against my son.I'll let you know what the headmaster says as soon as I know.
Scatshouse.
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Bewildered
- Posts: 1806
- Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2006 2:29 pm
- Location: Berkshire
It's a difficult situation, and it's a shame that the teacher concerned wasn't
professional enough to own up to her error, apologise, and leave the matter there.
At least the head is aware of the situation now. Hopefully he will be professional and deal with this matter accordingly,
and also try to prevent such things from happening in the future.
professional enough to own up to her error, apologise, and leave the matter there.
At least the head is aware of the situation now. Hopefully he will be professional and deal with this matter accordingly,
and also try to prevent such things from happening in the future.
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KES Parent
You can always count on a bully to be a liar as well.scatshouse wrote:Hi all,
Just to update you on what's happened so far:
On Friday morning in the playground I asked a few children, independently, what they heard the teacher say to my son. (Just in the hope that he'd misheard). All of them said exactly the same as my son.
I then, against your advice I know
Scatshouse.
I am so sorry to hear about this. Absolutely unacceptable and I am afraid typical that some teachers seem to get away with this sort of behaviour and then lie about it. Well done for speaking directly to her tho' because I very much doubt that she will do it again (at least not to your son) I think you did the right thing. I had a simular situation recently when my son was distraught because a teacher had yelled at the boy seated next to him that he was 'the most horrible boy she had ever met' What is going on? Thankfully teachers like this are, I hope in the minority. I have nothing but praise for all the others my kids have had previously. Good luck with this. I hope your son can continue doing so well and thus demonstrate how much more sensible and mature he is than his teacher appears to be!