Put Downs from Teachers

Discussion of all things non-11 Plus related

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caz34red
Posts: 39
Joined: Sat Dec 01, 2007 1:20 pm
Location: Bucks

Post by caz34red »

I was hoping things might change with time but apparently not!!

I had a Primary School Teacher that absolutely hated me, we are talking many years ago now. She would at any given opportunity ridicule me in front of the class, tell me her 2 year old could draw better than me I was 11, make me stand in the corner with my hands on my head (very little would provoke this) constantly tell me why can't you be more like Joanne (teachers pet), would outwardly grown if the cricket ball was coming towards me inevitably I would drop it, she even tried to put a spanner in the works when the school were voting for House Captains I was in the running and she tried to dissuade people from voting for me, luckily my younger friend rallied round the playground for votes and she was ignored!! I left Primary School with very little confidence (funny enough I did borderline pass, but my Mum was told I would be better off in the Upper School due to my lack of confidence, if only the Headmaster knew why). She always said I would not amount to much. Funny thing is years later (2000 to be precise) I bumped into her, I always wanted to get her back, but on seeing her I basically told her how well my life had turned out, I had a fairly good job, I was extremely pleasant etc, (I felt like saying despite you). I told her I was doing a run for charity and she sponsored me, she wrote a cheque out to me for £20, I had not seen her since 1981, it was definately Guilt I think she realised how horrible she had been.

On a nicer note I had a fantastic teacher in Secondary School, that helped me achieve so much and believe in myself, she was always praising me, (I was a fairly decent athlete, although definately NOT cricket, I still run from the ball if it is heading in my direction!!)

Thankfully the experience made me stronger and made me want to reach goals to prove I could, so in a way I have her to thank for that I suppose!!
Caz34red
pooodle
Posts: 77
Joined: Mon Feb 18, 2008 8:47 am

Post by pooodle »

Just as devils advocate, from the other side of the fence as it were! I agree that the teachers comment was a bit off, but we are only human, and to be honest unless they are always picking on the child, i think its a bit over the top to go the head. Teachers really resent parents complaining, you have to remember at primary they are with the same 30 odd kids pretty much all day, and mostly work very hard for them.

So a parent complaining is a bit of a slap in the face, and may make the teacher resent the child for "telling tales".

I would have suggested a note to the teacher just saying x was a bit upset about comment on grammar, and misunderstood task, and leave it at that, they would then either hopefully explain their side or take on board, but no harm done if you see what i mean.
scatshouse
Posts: 438
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2007 10:00 am

Post by scatshouse »

Hi Pooodle,
they are with the same 30 odd kids pretty much all day
She only takes my son's class one lesson a week, she's really a year 2 teacher, and I know from both my daughter and son that they were terrified of her in year 2. I didn't rock the boat then because my children had many more years to spend in the school.
I would have suggested a note to the teacher just saying x was a bit upset about comment on grammar, and misunderstood task, and leave it at that
,

I spoke to the teacher myself, giving her a chance to explain/apologise, she did neither. I really was just going to leave it at that but I didn't like the way she looked at me in the playground the next morning and also the fact that she was calling 5 children liars.
So a parent complaining is a bit of a slap in the face
I also found out that morning that mine was the fourth complaint that week. So maybe that's what she needs!
KES Parent

Post by KES Parent »

scatshouse wrote:
So a parent complaining is a bit of a slap in the face
I also found out that morning that mine was the fourth complaint that week. So maybe that's what she needs!
I agree. Most of us would face disciplinary action if we routinely humiliated customers/ clients/patients/whatever in the course of our jobs. And quite right too.
Mum42
Posts: 7
Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2008 11:50 am

Put downs from teachers

Post by Mum42 »

It's reassuring to know we are not alone.

We heard last week that our daughter had got into her first choice grammar school. Her primary school has never supported our decision to enter her for the 11+. She is the only child from her school ever to have done the 11+ and with so much hostility from the headmistress down, I can see why.

In the lead up to the exam, she was doing well at school despite working very hard for the exams too, but she was forbidden by her class teacher from talking about the 11+ because she might not pass it (we had a particularly explosive parents evening when I said our family didn't avoid challenges just because we might not succeed).

I though it might have blown over by now, but the prejudice returned worse than ever once the secondary school results were out last week. She was told off for giving correct answers in maths - just alternative ones to the obvious.

Finally, on Thursday, she was taken aside for the most extraordinary half-hour rant from the class teacher about the whole class being completely sick of her going on about her grammar school (actually, she doesn't, because she's very conscious that it seems to rub some people up the wrong way). As if that wasn't enough, her teacher went on to tell her off for giving "too clever" answers which apparently "put down" the rest of the class.

In desperation, I started to think about taking her out of school and educating her at home for her final term. It started as a wild idea, but now it's growing on us.
gloucestermum
Posts: 739
Joined: Sat Feb 03, 2007 5:14 pm
Location: Gloucester

Post by gloucestermum »

Mum42,that seems to me absolutely outrageous behaviour from a teacher to be subjecting a young child to.I ceertainly would be taking it further with the school-although you may not get anywhere from your description of the whole school approach to the 11+,it is no excuse for that kind of behaviour.Also,as a school governor,perhaps a letter addressed to the Chair would be appropriate if the head is not helpful?
Just a blessing that your DD has only a few more months to go!

GM
Chardan
Posts: 66
Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2008 1:05 am
Location: Chelmsford

Post by Chardan »

pooodle wrote:Just as devils advocate, from the other side of the fence as it were! I agree that the teachers comment was a bit off, but we are only human, and to be honest unless they are always picking on the child, i think its a bit over the top to go the head. Teachers really resent parents complaining, you have to remember at primary they are with the same 30 odd kids pretty much all day, and mostly work very hard for them.

So a parent complaining is a bit of a slap in the face, and may make the teacher resent the child for "telling tales".

I would have suggested a note to the teacher just saying x was a bit upset about comment on grammar, and misunderstood task, and leave it at that, they would then either hopefully explain their side or take on board, but no harm done if you see what i mean.
Pooodle

Congratulations - It's not often that I am lost for words - but I am speechless. Absolutely appalled by your comments. 'Teachers resent parents complaining!?!?!?!?!?!?'


Scatshouse - don't forget to confirm your conversation in writing and if you don't get a satisfactory response, escalate it to the Governors. There should be a Complaints Governor assigned to deal with this kind of issue.
Marylou
Posts: 2164
Joined: Sat Feb 25, 2006 2:21 am

Re: Put downs from teachers

Post by Marylou »

Mum42 - that's unbelievable! The school should be pleased with her and proud of her achievement, not treating her as if she is some sort of problem.
Mum42 wrote:
In desperation, I started to think about taking her out of school and educating her at home for her final term. It started as a wild idea, but now it's growing on us.
Great idea - one less set of straight level 5s. And serve 'em right too, I say! :wink: Though perhaps that wouldn't bother them - after all, the target for everyone is supposed to be level 4, isn't it? :?

Go for it - I'm sure you'll have a wonderful term! :) (But if you do, make sure you let the governors know why.)

I wish your daughter well in her new school.

Marylou
aliportico
Posts: 888
Joined: Wed Aug 01, 2007 12:19 pm

Re: Put downs from teachers

Post by aliportico »

Mum42 wrote:In desperation, I started to think about taking her out of school and educating her at home for her final term. It started as a wild idea, but now it's growing on us.
Oh, if you can, why not? What would she miss at school? A lot of SATS revision? Do they do any good trips that she'd mind missing? She's not going to miss anything particularly academic, and it doesn't sound like this teacher's going to suddenly become any nicer to her.

We've home educated for years (my eldest is going to grammar school in September - her choice), and it's great. You could have a lovely relaxed 5 or 6 months before she goes to secondary school, finding out about stuff she's interested in and setting her up for a great start in September.

PM me if you want to talk about HE at all!
Mum42
Posts: 7
Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2008 11:50 am

Put downs by teachers

Post by Mum42 »

Thank you so much for your support. It makes us feel much better! Aliportico, we certainly will pm you if we look like going the HE route. At the moment, we're waiting to see how we all feel about each other by the end of the holidays :)
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