Christmas 2017

[KB]

Christ is the focus of Christmas for us so after several weeks of services and events Christmas afternoon is quite low key! As the DCs get older just having time together is a blessing.

To those who find certain family members a trial ( & we are no different from others in this regard!) I would urge making the best of it - you never know when there might be fewer of you to celebrate with next year.

Inviting some waifs and strays tends to deflect family stresses!

Hardest part in days of old was definitely fulfilling expectations of grandparents on both sides. Something I hope to remember if I ever get to that position myself

On the buying of livestock etc, when we have done this for a family we have also bought a small 'physical' gift eg a small soft toy pig, filled pencil case for the children.

[Amber]

[ That is the fault of commerce not 'Christmas' itself - It's perfectly OK to reject the commercial aspects and focus on what makes a real difference - helping the homeless, supporting older people and those on their own. After all, isn't that what Christmas is really about?
It's prefectly possible to celebrate without excess

Oh I know, of course it isn't the fault of Christmas itself. But I do not have a Christian faith, and that is what Christmas is 'really about'. That is what is being celebrated and just as I do not celebrate Eid because I am not a Muslim, so I am not sure about celebrating Christmas when I am not a Christian. I can do all the other stuff (and I do!) without hanging it on Christmas. I love the lights and candles in the house (have them already) but here they are more like the Scandinavian ones which fill the houses as soon as the evenings get dark; and I like some of the seasonal food too. I can make my friends feel special and welcome in my home (I do that anyway) and I can give gifts but would greatly prefer that to be spontaneous and not because it is Christmas. But the pressure to enjoy oneself, and the ridiculous 'oh what shall I get for x?', for me outweigh the nice things. The awfulness for people who don't have family or friends who want to be with them must be so dreadful and alienating when it is in your face at every turn - TV, radio, posters etc - from October onwards, building up to 'the big day' which is almost inevitably not all it has been built up to be.

One of my friends is a very committed Christian and hates it too. She often works at Christmas by choice.

[KB]

In terms of the secular holiday I guess it's useful to have a time when families focus on spending together but I agree about the long lead up and feeling for the lonely and isolated for whom it just reinforces their sadness.
I also get very annoyed by the pressure/ encouragement to spend into debt and the resulting hardship.
I saw an article ( maybe a TV trailer?) that suggested a child's stocking alone costs on average well over £100.....

[piggys]

We are a Christian family and therefore Christmas is a religious occasion for us, as well as the more fun and celebratory side of things. We go to quite a few Church events at our Church and we do mark it as the occasion of Christ's birth. I don't like the way it has morphed into something excessive and materialistic. I could quite happily go without any presents but one of my DBs is terribly indulgent and insists on spending a fortune every year on all of us....his heart is in the right place but I wish he would tone it all down a bit!

When I was growing up we had no money so Christmas was an exercise in careful economic strategy for my parents, I now see. I still loved it though. it is entirely possible to be frugal but have a lovely time.

Ever been to St Paul's or Westminster Cathedral or Abbey for midnight mass? even if you aren't a Christian, it's worth going - you will feel the magic in the air.

[KB]

I dont go to 'midnight mass' any longer due to a few bad experiences with visitors coming in somewhat inebriated from the pub.
I know several churches who brought it forward to before closing time.
Maybe with longer licences it doesn't happen so much now?
Not sure I'd make it up for morning service if I did midnight mass these days - need my beauty sleep
Can imagine St Paul's would be worth a trip though.



My DCs love all the family traditions at Christmas, even if they have to be shuffled around a bit to meet everyone's schedules. Much less likely to be sibling squabbles now they all live apart

We got to the stage of buying presents ( usually vouchers) for older teens who we rarely saw and some of whom never bothered with a thank you so bit the bullet and politely suggested to friends/ family we brought it to an end. Thankfully no-one took serious offence.

[doodles]

It must be this thread. I have just put more some candles out and have a new sausage roll recipe cooking in the oven.

DH has been sent to the loft to find a missing box. We have a Christmas cupboard and the box with the Christmas cushions and jumpers is missing This is verging on a crisis so he's been sent to search.

We also have roast turkey for dinner

[ToadMum]

It must be this thread. I have just put more some candles out and have a new sausage roll recipe cooking in the oven.

DH has been sent to the loft to find a missing box. We have a Christmas cupboard and the box with the Christmas cushions and jumpers is missing This is verging on a crisis so he's been sent to search.

We also have roast turkey for dinner

Doodles, don't get me wrong. We 'do' Christmas socially (rather like a certain family represented in the current Tesco ad, possibly?). I am even learning to live with turkey, as DD really likes it, although I make absolutely no attempt to get a bird large enough to last the entire holiday season, as my mum always seemed to manage to do. Definitely one of those 'How did we manage to survive childhood?' experiences, the Christmas fare of my youth...

And yes, we give presents and receive with gratitude those given to us. And if, say, there was something significant that one of the children was saving up for, we might indicate that a small monetary contribution might be appreciated, rather than the usual 'physical' present. But being sent a list complete with the rider that the compiler of said list was 'very picky', rather gets my goat. And may yet do so .

[doodles]

And yes, we give presents and receive with gratitude those given to us. And if, say, there was something significant that one of the children was saving up for, we might indicate that a small monetary contribution might be appreciated, rather than the usual 'physical' present. But being sent a list complete with the rider that the compiler of said list was 'very picky', rather gets my goat. And may yet do so .

It would get my goat too TM as it's just basically rude. If somebody asked what DS wanted and they were saving for something I might suggest a small contribution too. To be told what to buy doesn't sit well with me people should be appreciative that people have thought of them. We went to a wedding recently and were asked to contribute to the honeymoon if we wanted to buy the happy couple a gift, I really didn't like that, it didn't feel right.

This year's Christmas shopping is a lot more clinical and "the bits" have been ditched in favour of a more streamlined approach, though when I suggested to ds1 (19yo) that he was too old for a stocking his face fell to his knees

This evening's roast turkey with most of the trimmings was delicious - small ones were on offer in the supermarket and it was a nice change from the usual Sunday roast and it will do a pie or risotto tomorrow and no more. I too remember childhood where it was touch and go whether the bird would fit in the oven and there were enough leftovers to feed the street for a week

And as much as I love Christmas I'm not a great fan of New Year

[KB]

For the few 'children' we still buy for I do usually speak with parents for advice ( unless I happen to see something I know they will love) and will give money if there is something specific they are saving for but I hate the idea of a list as described.

When my DC got married they struggled with the concept of a wedding list but were persuaded that people would buy anyway so it was less wasteful to be specific in their needs but if someone did this for a birthday or Christmas they would definitely be getting half a pig for evermore!
One year for our godson we sponsored a child ( on an ongoing basis) on his behalf and he had then to exchange letters. Perhaps that would be a useful exercise for the person in question....

(Crossed with doodles - very jealous of your dinner btw!)

[KS10]

Doodles will you stay with me for two weeks over Christmas? I have visitors and I've never cooked for lots of people several nights in a row. I promise you won't miss your family as you'll be too busy cooking .