11 Plus Exams Forum

Was wondering whether to go along the route of enrolling DS in a drama club or football club to help with building social skills and confidence.

Any opinions or other recommendations appreciated

It will entirely depend on your son's interests. For some (mine) football would be their worst nightmare. For others it would be the same with drama. If he enjoys drama there is nothing better that I have come across for building confidence & engaging with other people - teamwork etc. But for a child who hates drama is would be a terrible experience. Others might enjoy martial arts, for example. I do think it is important for them to have interests outside school, if nothing else in order to not have exams as the focus & to make friends from outside school. What are your son's interests?

thanks scarymum, he would gladly do both! I'm veering towards drama at the moment.

Then why doesn't he try both? My boys have both done a sport and a non sport activity, and got different things out of each of them.

As someone who was really shy as a child and having a shy DD as well, I’d say let him pick something he will enjoy for its own sake, not as a vehicle for ‘improving his social skills and confidence’.

If he enjoys it for its own sake, then the confidence stuff will follow naturally. Don’t make him do something just to boost confidence. It probably won’t help and he will hate it.

It might help if he has a friend to go with. It gives them a bit of a boost.

If it is the case that he is shy, then it is important to remember that shyness is not necessarily a lack of confidence as such.

With the right encouragement they do get there. DD has improved in this area a lot in the last couple of years. This summer she attended a musical theatre summer school through her own choice. She didn’t know anyone else going. At the end of the week they did a show and she spoke and even sang solo. She sang solo in a School concert earlier in the year and I almost cried because I never thought she would ever feel brave enough to volunteer to do that.

She will never be the most outgoing person in a group of people she isn’t really familiar with, but it is no longer a hurdle she can’t get past.

Thanks Tinkers and Scary Mum, yes I agree that enjoying the extra curricular activity is crucial to benefiting from it. I'll see if DS can trial out both drama and football and see what he prefers. In any case both activities involve team work and getting along with others.

I can't even begin to tell you how much drama has helped one of my children over the years. . Not particularly sociable but loves being involved in a group activity. Find some thing they enjoy and the social skills will come.

Also have you considered Scouting? That's worked well for us too.

The other thing about drama groups is that there is always the techy side of things to get involved in as well.

Thanks for the helpful responses - DS is excited about trying out both these hobbies.

Need to put my two Penneth in for Martial Arts. If at a good school, the benefit are so many, and personally I would say outweigh anything football has. (And they turn into nice, respectful people too)