Have I done the wrong thing?

[johnd]

I think you did the right thing, you must remember yourself how the secondary school friendships are totally different and keep changing. It sounds dictatorial, but I don't think kids at this age have any sense of perspective about the choices they face.

[Sportsmum]

By the end of the trial day next term, they will already have started to make new friends and possibly rediscover old ones. Year 7 is a strange year and friendship groups change dramatically by the end of the year - especially as they are all maturing at different rates. You have done the right thing, but it is tough making decisions like this - it will all work itself out.

[dlb]

You did the right thing!! Kids make friends anywhere, but it's the quality of the school you should make the decision on - not where there friends are going!

[mad?]

I agree you have made the right decision. DD1 went with 2 friends to high school and DD2 with none. The 6 months from offer to starting were harder for DD2, I had the same doubts that you did. She did feel a bit excluded from some of the Y6 pre Y7 friendship shuffling. Her taster day in truth just served to remind her she was 'alone' although she still enjoyed it. I think once she knew where she was going she just wanted to get on with it and so did I! However, from the first 10 minutes of actually starting high school to the present day (now Y8 and 10) DD2 has had a much easier time socially than DD1 precisely as a result of her not being encumbered by two so called 'friends' from primary. Keep the faith and it will be fine.

[hedwigsmum]

Thank you all for the kind reassurance. I know DS will find the next few months stressful, but I think he will be fine in the end.

[capers123]

They really do make new friends very quickly.

DD1 went off with 10 other girls from primary. Now in year 9, she is still friendly with most of them, good friends with 2, but also has many new friends from all over the place.

DD2 went up with only 2 girls from her school - her best friends went to various other schools. She sort of knew a few other people from Saturday Music, but within the first couple of days had brought two new friends home. Quite often friendship groups seem to form on the walk / bus / train to school.