Hi my daughter aged 13 is a young carer. Her mother receives highest rate of PIP. She helps her mother and young sibling in day to day chores during my absence. Her responsibilities have increased since lock down as my wife carer is not visiting anymore. She doesn’t want her school to know about this as she finds it embarrassing. My question is That should I tell her school about this ? If yes then how can I do that in a way that my daughter doesn’t know about this. She is a very quite shy student who doesn’t talk much in the school. Her school reports shows that she is working at the age expected level and her behaviour is excellent . I have spoken to her And she says that these extra responsibilities doesn’t affect her life and she is happy to be a care giver of her mother. Kindly if someone has similar experience do give me advice or PM me.

The school should ideally be made aware (via her form tutor/ pastoral lead/ head of year - whichever is appropriate) but will make it clear on any notes they have about your daughter that it's not to be brought up with her unless she initiates it. If things are going well and she is coping that's great, but if there's a crisis or a time when extra sensitivity might be necessary then it helps for a few key people to be aware in case it should become relevant.

Can you not find another carer? I have a friend who runs a care business and they never stopped visiting any of their customers throughout lockdown and never had a single incident of Covid amongst their customers due to all the extra hygiene put in place. If the carer is employed directly by you and they have health conditions of their own then maybe this is a bit more complicated but if not then this should be explored.

Thanks great advice I will write to her KS3 administers. I might use your wording as these precisely summarise what I want them to know.

It is really tough for your family to have lost your carer during lockdown.
This has happened a lot in my area because services are so stretched at the moment.
Many carers are themselves high risk for Covid and have not been able to work.
I agree you should talk to the pastoral team.
Does your daughter have contact with the young carers group locally?
She should also be flagged on her GP notes as a young carer.