Dear Experienced Mum
I am very sad to hear of the struggle you and your daughter are having, but I am so glad that you posted your experience on the Forum.
I am often contacted by PM (as Etienne, Patricia and others are) by parents who are desperate to help their child pass the 11+ or to win an Appeal. Although we always give our best advice, there are times when I feel that the parents should accept that the child is not GS material, and I have taken to hinting that of late. However, you have given a timely warning to others to be realistic about their child's ability.
That said, in your daughter's case, please don't lose sight of the fact that she did pass the 11+, and the jury is out for evermore on whether coaching makes any difference.
The first year at GS can be very tough - some of the children will have come from very high quality state schools, and others will have come from Prep schools where the expectations are higher and the children have more experience of the senior school modus operandi
- moving around for lessons and all that, and have been used to mountains of homework (as have their long-suffering Mums!
). Prep school children seem to have a definite advantage in that first year according to most reports.
The worst may be over for you and your daughter by now, and I do hope it is. Please do let us know how you get on - preferably on this thread, for the sake of continuity.