My one concern about grammar schools
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hermanmunster
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neurotic kent mum
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Road Runner
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Mel x
My son is in year eight and appears to be thriving. He puts in a lot of effort because he knows that this is what is expected.
His dad and I aren't pushy we encourage him to do his best and have pulled him up in the past if he isn't putting in the effort but we also tell him to chill a bit and not to try to hard at times. He doesn't know yet what his career path will be and we wouldn't expect him to he is only 12 but he does know that in year 9 he will be working harder for SATS and dropping subjects and he accepts that.
He is a very sociable happy boy and we want to keep him that way which is why when he needs help we are there to help him.
He goes to school by bus so isn't home until nearly 5 each day and because of homework, dinner etc he doesn't have lots of time to go out with his friends. He won't go out if he has alot of work to do and sometimes I find myself pushing him to do just that but he would rather relax when he has the time during the week and then go out at weekends.
There are lots of clubs he could go to after school but it isn't always practicle as I am not always able to pick him up.
I don't know how different the GS parents are I am a GS parent and I don't think I would be different if he was in a non Grammar school although I suspect it would depend on the school. I never encounter other parents other then parents evenings the summer fete and again I suspect thats the same in all secondary schools.
I guess most parents GS or not are more laid back when thier childs reaches Secondary school as we are when they reach any other milestone.
Until the next one ofcourse!!
Mel
His dad and I aren't pushy we encourage him to do his best and have pulled him up in the past if he isn't putting in the effort but we also tell him to chill a bit and not to try to hard at times. He doesn't know yet what his career path will be and we wouldn't expect him to he is only 12 but he does know that in year 9 he will be working harder for SATS and dropping subjects and he accepts that.
He is a very sociable happy boy and we want to keep him that way which is why when he needs help we are there to help him.
He goes to school by bus so isn't home until nearly 5 each day and because of homework, dinner etc he doesn't have lots of time to go out with his friends. He won't go out if he has alot of work to do and sometimes I find myself pushing him to do just that but he would rather relax when he has the time during the week and then go out at weekends.
There are lots of clubs he could go to after school but it isn't always practicle as I am not always able to pick him up.
I don't know how different the GS parents are I am a GS parent and I don't think I would be different if he was in a non Grammar school although I suspect it would depend on the school. I never encounter other parents other then parents evenings the summer fete and again I suspect thats the same in all secondary schools.
I guess most parents GS or not are more laid back when thier childs reaches Secondary school as we are when they reach any other milestone.
Until the next one ofcourse!!
Mel
I think it depends which GS you choose. We chose one which requires a pass over superselective for our DD due to the atmosphere and pastoral care, although she would have got a place there - she pressurises herself and doesn't need additional v.pressurised environment. Some 'friends' queried our decision, but it was absolutely right. Daughter doing very well at top of top set and surrounded by really nice v.bright girls who also didn't choose superselective for same reasons and she is stretched, challenged and v.v. happy- our priority!!!
So make choices carefully - snob value isn't always best for your child
So make choices carefully - snob value isn't always best for your child
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reginaphalangie
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Oh yes some GS parents are soooo laid back - its the schools entire responsibility isn't it to get these kids thru the GCSE's....mmmm methinks not.....Its all too common (as GS teacher) to find GS parents who think the school has sole responsibility for getting the kids through the exams....indicative of society really 
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Bexley Mum 2
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Reginaphalangie - as a GS teacher, I'd be interested to hear what level and type of input you would like to see from parents. I think a lot of us are probably guilty of breathing a heavy sigh of relief when we've got our children through the 11+ and thinking that it's "over to the GS now" (I know I probably am!)
I've got Y7 and Y9 boys who are fairly self-sufficient. I don't need to tell the youngest to do his homework and the eldest needs a bit of a nudge now and then but would probably get round to it eventually anyway. I offer advice when asked, but this isn't very often, especially as they both tend to do a lot of homework at school. I look through their books and might talk to them about any negative comments from teachers and what they're going to do about them, and praise any positive comments. I try and take opportunities to talk about things we know they are doing at school, eg eldest is doing speeches as part of his work on Animal Farm so we talked about Barack Obama's speech and what made it so good. I might ask them some bits of French when we're in the car. Y7 boy is doing Private Peaceful and we had a chat about that last night.
But apart from that I'm not sure what else I could or should be doing.
I'd be grateful for any suggestions, especially as we're rapidly approaching GCSE courses. (Please bear in mind that Y9 maths and science is beyond me!!)
I've got Y7 and Y9 boys who are fairly self-sufficient. I don't need to tell the youngest to do his homework and the eldest needs a bit of a nudge now and then but would probably get round to it eventually anyway. I offer advice when asked, but this isn't very often, especially as they both tend to do a lot of homework at school. I look through their books and might talk to them about any negative comments from teachers and what they're going to do about them, and praise any positive comments. I try and take opportunities to talk about things we know they are doing at school, eg eldest is doing speeches as part of his work on Animal Farm so we talked about Barack Obama's speech and what made it so good. I might ask them some bits of French when we're in the car. Y7 boy is doing Private Peaceful and we had a chat about that last night.
But apart from that I'm not sure what else I could or should be doing.
I'd be grateful for any suggestions, especially as we're rapidly approaching GCSE courses. (Please bear in mind that Y9 maths and science is beyond me!!)
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T.i.p.s.y
I think its a parents job to teach their kids to be well-mannered and well-behaved and for schools to teach kids academic subjects and parents imput to be purely supportive. If my kids were at GS or if I'm paying for independent schools then I fully expect the teachers to get kids through exams etc - is that not what they are paid to do?
I can't speak as a GS parent (11+ is tomorrow in Gloucestershire), but I can speak as a former grammar pupil, a former comprehensive pupil (the school turned from one to the other, merging with the girls secondary next door, when I started the 4th form) and a parent of 2 primary pupils.
We support our children by providing activities not supplied within the school curriculum.
For example: when DD was doing a project on Rivers in the UK, we took her to Hereford, then followed the Wye down to the sea, so she could take pictures and find our a little more about it. We didn't write the project for her, although I did find a book in the library for her.
We take them to Woodcraft Folk (a little like liberal Scouts/Guides) to learn outdoor skill that we, and the school, can't provide. And of course, there's a lot of running around and playing involved as well - very important.
Then DD belongs to NYFTE - the National Youth Folklore Troupe of England - which has a weekend and full week residential workshop where the children (10 - 18) hone their performance skills (dance, singing & instrumental) - somewhat more involved than school Country Dance Club, or for that matter, the local Grammar Barn Dance Band. There's also the instrumental lessons out of school.
Teaching them to cook is an important thing for us, as well as how to expand their use of computers.
Both daughters come home and at some point in the evening do their home work, mainly without nagging from us. If they're stuck, we'll help, but being reasonably bright are normally quite resourceful so don't need help.
Now I tend to think of formal education being the resposibility of the school. That's what they're there for, and what the teachers are paid to do.
When we sent the children to school already able to read, we were chastised as we'd done it wrong (not using the schools scheme). The same kind of thing happened (for example) with music, where the 8 year old is bored & disruptive in music class as it's much too easy for her (she's just taken G2 piano).
So just how are we expected to take on part of the load of teaching once they get to secondary school?
We support our children by providing activities not supplied within the school curriculum.
For example: when DD was doing a project on Rivers in the UK, we took her to Hereford, then followed the Wye down to the sea, so she could take pictures and find our a little more about it. We didn't write the project for her, although I did find a book in the library for her.
We take them to Woodcraft Folk (a little like liberal Scouts/Guides) to learn outdoor skill that we, and the school, can't provide. And of course, there's a lot of running around and playing involved as well - very important.
Then DD belongs to NYFTE - the National Youth Folklore Troupe of England - which has a weekend and full week residential workshop where the children (10 - 18) hone their performance skills (dance, singing & instrumental) - somewhat more involved than school Country Dance Club, or for that matter, the local Grammar Barn Dance Band. There's also the instrumental lessons out of school.
Teaching them to cook is an important thing for us, as well as how to expand their use of computers.
Both daughters come home and at some point in the evening do their home work, mainly without nagging from us. If they're stuck, we'll help, but being reasonably bright are normally quite resourceful so don't need help.
Now I tend to think of formal education being the resposibility of the school. That's what they're there for, and what the teachers are paid to do.
When we sent the children to school already able to read, we were chastised as we'd done it wrong (not using the schools scheme). The same kind of thing happened (for example) with music, where the 8 year old is bored & disruptive in music class as it's much too easy for her (she's just taken G2 piano).
So just how are we expected to take on part of the load of teaching once they get to secondary school?
Capers
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T.i.p.s.y
