Coping with Year 11 stress and anxiety

[silverysea]

How are we doing?

All is calm here but maybe not hugely successful so far on the revision front! I wonder if homework might have been more likely to be done rather than open-ended “go revise”.

[russet]

KS10, I took on board what you were saying about recording what they had revised rather than writing a timetable and have helped dd put in place something between the two. She now has a grid to tick off when she has done an hour of a subject, so she can keep track of what she has done and know she is giving roughly equal times to each subject. I also helped her plan which days she would work and how many hours. Also to plan in contingency, so if she does not work one day she can work another. So far it is going well as she can pick and chose what she does, rather than "This hour is chemistry". So thank you.

I would like to know how much revision on holidays, school nights or weekends children tend to do in year 11. I wonder if I am pushing her to do too much or not encouraging her to do enough.

I still have to keep reminding dd that reading is not revising, she has to do something with the information; questions or mindmaps or revision notes, for it to sink in.

[silverysea]

Good idea, I will try to have a conversation about recording progress rather than lack thereof tomorrow. I’m not really allowed to ask much, but I did print out one of Guest55’s resources, an A4 poster of formulas needing to be memorised, left it on the printer and found it elsewhere in the house so she must have discovered it before I chased her with it! No one else in the house, unless it was a maths-loving ghost. The rest of the family come back tomorrow night so it will be harder with dd1 hanging around, mocking and tempting dd2 to slack off. Hope dd1 goes out with her mates! She will have her own comeuppance back at uni, but seems to be finding it a lot easier than A levels so far.

I am going to suggest she tries another of those maths sites tomorrow. Wish me luck.

[loobylou]

Dd is doing 6 hours a day over the holidays - with 4 days off for family stuff. She's doing 2 X 3 hour blocks. Thus far she doesn't seem too phased by it. She seems much more relaxed than I expected and appears to have taken on board the notion that mocks are a stepping stone to the real thing rather than important in their own right.

[kenyancowgirl]

Blimey....6 hours a day?!! That is huge! DS1 didn't even do that for the real things and neither DS1 or 2 did that amount for mocks - it may be a boy/girl difference but neither of them could sit and focus for 3 hour blocks - and I would query how much really gets done after the first 45 mins to an hour - psychologists say that most people can only properly concentrate in small chunks....

[loobylou]

Blimey....6 hours a day?!! That is huge! DS1 didn't even do that for the real things and neither DS1 or 2 did that amount for mocks - it may be a boy/girl difference but neither of them could sit and focus for 3 hour blocks - and I would query how much really gets done after the first 45 mins to an hour - psychologists say that most people can only properly concentrate in small chunks....

She feels as though she's managing it ok. She says that that's only 6 hours per subject in total so doesn't feel as though it's an awful lot. It will be interesting to see how she feels for the real thing. She expects to do the same over Easter for the real thing but might be different in reality...

[russet]

Silverysea, I am struggling to keep the balance right between suporting dd or just standing back. I started by advising dd how to revise and got nowhere. Only when I asked dd how she thought her revision was going, did she say she was struggling and did want some help. It sounds also as though a word with dd1 might also help along the lines of; does she really want her sister to not do well? I do love the humour in your posts and that must also help with the stress.

Loobylou, dd is doing slightly less. She does 6 hours of study in 2 lots of 4 hour blocks (30 mins breaks between each hour). But is having 8 days working, 9 days holiday over Christmas.

I was going to suggest 2 hours was reasonable after school once she is back and one day study at the weekend. This would be about 15 hours a week. Then perhaps see if she wants to do more in April and May. I have read of people expecting their children to do much more (eg. 3 hours after school). Dd wants to do well and I have told her this is enough for top grades. What do others think?

Kenyancowgirl, dd does find the 6 hours intense, but doable. Having days when we forget revision and go out and do something else does help. It is good to know others have got good grades doing less, however, dd's mocks were not as high as she was hoping and she wants to go up a grade in most, and two grades in a couple of others.

Between December and May is this possible? I do not want to give her false hope.

[KB]

Its helpful to get input from others but everyone is different in how much they 'need' to do and how to timetable it effectively so I'd be wary of too much comparison.

I have also seen studies that suggest 45 mins is about the max most people can concentrate for in one hit. They also suggest only a short break is needed before continuing, so a loo trip or making a cup of tea for example. Getting a breath of fresh air and stretching is something I've advised but I've not seen any research, just seems sensible.

[kenyancowgirl]

There is a company that comes into our school to advise parents on what does appear like common sense approaches to stress and anxiety for GCSEs - he quotes a lot of research which flags the 45 minutes with small breaks (about 15 minutes is good enough). I have always said to my boys it isn't the quantity that matters, it's the quality of revision that does - they both have friends that "do hours" but are not working as effectively if you look at results - you have to let them find their balance as, ultimately they have to learn to revise without you watching over them - A levels and degree, parents should be a whole lot more hands off!

[Eccentric]

Dds stress levels have been ok all holiday until now. There are only a couple of days of revision time left and I had suggested that she takes at least 2 days off before going back to school. She has suddenly decided that she hasn’t done nearly enough revision (she has spent about 8 hours a day but not sure how effectively so the melt downs have begun.