Am I asking too much?

[Amber]

Don't want to offer conflicting advice or confuse you, but I do think that the weekend would be very difficult for the 17 family if this were to be left hanging in the air for almost a week, and also the options might diminish significantly. Decisions and options taken at this age are vital for future prospects and it is so important to try and keep a clear head and not to allow judgement to be clouded by emotion (totally impossible, but we know the theory). The long term is more important than the immediate, and if battles need to be fought, or a new school considered in haste, then so be it. If Master 17 wants to study certain subjects and has the required aptitude for them, which doesn't seem to be in doubt, then I feel that should override everything else. Hopefully he has a very long future ahead of him, in which to either regret or be glad of the choices he makes now.

Fran, this is horrid time but it will pass, and you will know you did all you could to support your son. Be guided by him and your own instincts, but don't feel it is all on your shoulders...it is a shared thing so don't blame yourself if you don't manage to get exactly what you want. But I think you will.
Good luck again.

[Fran17]

Thank you Amber. I am going to try to speak to the Head in the morning as hopefully he will have received my email by then. I will be calm and polite but will state my case. I have looked at STEM and it has certainly given me some more ammunition.

You are quite right, I will not be able to bear the weekend if the issue is still unresolved, although I am aware the school may refuse to act until Tuesday. You live and learn don't you. I will not fall into this trap with DS3. DH said if we don't have any joy tomorrow he will make an appointment to see the Head.

[hermanmunster]

Fran, I really hope this gets sorted out before the beginning of term ... quite ridiculous that they won't be flexible and allow him to do the appropriate A levels.

Worth knowing that there can be some movement between schools in the first few weeks of term for one reason or another and so all is not lost re the other schools...

.. you may think my advice a little OTT but I tend to find going to the top and making a fuss helps .. :wink If I was in your shoes I might send an e-mail to the teachers / head asking if they will provide references for the other schools you are considering.

[Belinda]

.

[Fran17]

That very thought had crossed my mind.

We are going to make a fuss. We can't let this go. It is too important because of the impact it may have on DS2's future.

[Fran17]

More ammunition may be found here Fran.
http://www.stemnet.org.uk" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

That is just where I have been looking.

[ourmaminhavana]

Sounds like you're doing all the right things Fran, good luck...

[Fran17]

Thank you everyone once again for all your support and advice. It is very much appreciated.

[Daogroupie]

If it is still unresolved by Tuesday then one of you needs to go in with him and wait outside in case he is presented with a timetable with two out of three A levels he no longer wants to do.

This time last year in our local sixth form college there was much movement for the first half term. Students kept arriving in classes who had either started out in their school's sixth form and found it was not really working for them, or had started other subjects and decided to move to a different A level. I would spend this time when you are unable to get hold of senior management in your school browsing the websites of other schools and talking to students already at the schools and get yourself a backup option sorted out. If your school think you are going to walk they are much more likely to do their best to accommodate you rather than risk losing your able ds from their league table slot for the next two years in AS and A2. DG

[Fran17]

I spoke to the Head's secretary this morning. She was about to type up the email which he had dictated to her. It basically said there is a process and he is not able to override it. He also said we have two options, DS can go back in on Tuesday, wait and see and hope for the best or he can go elsewhere. He added that they would not want to lose my DS as he is a very valued student but unfortunately there is nothing he can do at present and he cannot give us any assurances at this stage.

I cannot tell you how stunned I am. The secretary is lovely and said lots of nice things about my DS and how the school would not want to lose him. I then received an email from the member of staff I spoke to yesterday who is obviously a bit miffed that I went to the head and he is going to 'desist from contacting me at this stage'. I have been nothing but measured and courteous at all times. It was never my intention to offend anyone. I was simply fighting my son's case. He went on to say that the options are not closed to him and hopes for my DS's sake circumstances will change. I sent back a very polite email saying that I hoped he understood that any action my husband and I were taking was purely in the best interests of our son and that our letter to the Head was a plea for help.

I think the school really needs to look at its 'process' which seems to be set in stone. We have rallied and have decided to look at other options and see what unfolds over the following week.

I cannot thank you all enough for the support you have given me. It was like the big arm of the forum came down and gave me a big cyber hug. Sorry if that sounds a bit OTT but that is how I felt. How wonderful that complete strangers can show such kindness and compassion.

We are remaining positive and I am hoping things will work out for the best. Please keep your fingers crossed for my DS. I will keep you all posted as to what happens next.