Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
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rubyhettybetty
- Posts: 344
- Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:26 pm
- Location: Rochester
Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
I think in our heart of hearts we know DD2 is not going to pass her 11+ - lots of reasons but I really do think so won't get through it. She got 5 out of 20 in mental maths yesterday and maths is supposed to be her best subject! She's year 5.
I said to DH 'why are we putting her though this?' - but she wants to do it and she wants to go to grammar school!
She has been going to a group tutor for a year and the tutor predicted a pass on an assessment in August, but this was just based on a maths and English exercise grossed up to give a score, they hadn't started VR by then and she hasn't taken to it that well.
I just feel really deflated today. Our comp options are dire - special measures etc and we can't REALLY afford indie, although I would like to...I just don't know what to do!!!!
I said to DH 'why are we putting her though this?' - but she wants to do it and she wants to go to grammar school!
She has been going to a group tutor for a year and the tutor predicted a pass on an assessment in August, but this was just based on a maths and English exercise grossed up to give a score, they hadn't started VR by then and she hasn't taken to it that well.
I just feel really deflated today. Our comp options are dire - special measures etc
and we can't REALLY afford indie, although I would like to...I just don't know what to do!!!!Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
Ruby you are having a bad day. Maybe your dd had a bad one too when she got 5 in the mental maths test. What levels do the school tell you she is working at? 
Even though sats are very different from 11 plus it is a resaonable indiacator of if they may do well in the test.
Also remember with the medway 11 plus that the VR is worth only 20 percent of the final mark - does she write well? As they double this score.
At the start of yesr5 my dd was only a 3C in maths! the teacher didnt even mention the 11 plus to me- what a maths mountain to climb - but through determination and hardwork we did it - i reacon when she took the 11 plus she was working at a 4b/4a - she got an average mark on the maths but a good one on the writing - again rememebr your dd can get two average marks and a good one and still pass.
Even though sats are very different from 11 plus it is a resaonable indiacator of if they may do well in the test. Also remember with the medway 11 plus that the VR is worth only 20 percent of the final mark - does she write well? As they double this score.
At the start of yesr5 my dd was only a 3C in maths! the teacher didnt even mention the 11 plus to me- what a maths mountain to climb - but through determination and hardwork we did it - i reacon when she took the 11 plus she was working at a 4b/4a - she got an average mark on the maths but a good one on the writing - again rememebr your dd can get two average marks and a good one and still pass.
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rubyhettybetty
- Posts: 344
- Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2010 2:26 pm
- Location: Rochester
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
LOL, Tiredmum, you are right, I *am* having a bad day - need a chocolate fix, and fast!
Not sure what levels she is at currently - I do recall the teacher upped her a levl when she joined class 5, and she is working in the top set of maths...not sure about English, but overall the standard in her class is not very high imo...I don't think she is forecast for 5's by the end year 6 anyway....
She seems to be able to write OK ish - can think of subject ok, but spelling and punctuation not good..I am going to speak to another tutor about having one-2-one if we can...
But I think we need to prepare ourselves ...I keep imagining myself in front of an appeal panel trying to sell them a child who isn't gs material....
Must go and get that chocolate!!!!
xx
Not sure what levels she is at currently - I do recall the teacher upped her a levl when she joined class 5, and she is working in the top set of maths...not sure about English, but overall the standard in her class is not very high imo...I don't think she is forecast for 5's by the end year 6 anyway....
She seems to be able to write OK ish - can think of subject ok, but spelling and punctuation not good..I am going to speak to another tutor about having one-2-one if we can...
But I think we need to prepare ourselves ...I keep imagining myself in front of an appeal panel trying to sell them a child who isn't gs material....
Must go and get that chocolate!!!!
xx
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
just to comfort you further - bad spelling will not lose many marks in the 11 plus - they are after the content - i checked this out as dd2 is a good writer but a bad speller. Get dd to develop some characters she could use in a story, diary, report, situation, she should be able to discribe their looks and personalities well, using lots of good words. She can then take them with her to the 11 plus in her head, keep her company 
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
Ruby
If you, the school and DD's tutor all thought that she couldn't do this and she was reluctant to put the work in, then I would say don't do it. However, your DD wants to do this, she wants to go to grammar school, so let her try. Your job is to do your best to support her with her preparation for the exam whatever the outcome.
Maybe it is time for her to get one-to-one tuition rather than group tuition. What does her current tutor say about her VR? Do you feel confident to do VR and/or maths work with her at home in addition to her current tuition? You could start with the Bond books that are a year below her current age to get her confidence up and then move up. Other things that will help with VR is if you/OH read to her every day so that she increases her vocabulary with words she won't necessarily come across in her own reading. Play word games that are fun rather than all work, etc. I am sure that there are lots of good ideas on this website.
If she/you put in all the effort and she does not pass at least you will both know that you tried.
If you, the school and DD's tutor all thought that she couldn't do this and she was reluctant to put the work in, then I would say don't do it. However, your DD wants to do this, she wants to go to grammar school, so let her try. Your job is to do your best to support her with her preparation for the exam whatever the outcome.
Maybe it is time for her to get one-to-one tuition rather than group tuition. What does her current tutor say about her VR? Do you feel confident to do VR and/or maths work with her at home in addition to her current tuition? You could start with the Bond books that are a year below her current age to get her confidence up and then move up. Other things that will help with VR is if you/OH read to her every day so that she increases her vocabulary with words she won't necessarily come across in her own reading. Play word games that are fun rather than all work, etc. I am sure that there are lots of good ideas on this website.
If she/you put in all the effort and she does not pass at least you will both know that you tried.
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
Oh Ruby you are on the treadmill again. I sympathise with you. Two years in a row and I can imagine its much harder when your first has passed, just normal we want to give our kids similar sort of opportunities.
Just give her all your support and the rest will be based on fate. However practically you may really want to think about the alternatives too. What will you do if she doesnt pass, is there a slightly better comp she could attend? Honestly having no choice is the worst place you can ever be. So perhaps there is something good you may find out about the other comps???.
Its hard Ruby even with the best intentions and all the work sometimes it just doesnt work but do all you can and have a fall back option that you probably dont like.
I also think even if she goes to a comp you will be on a good platform to help her. Having your eldest a year ahead in a grammar you will have an idea about the pace and expectations which you can pass down too. Dont be dishearted now, keep ploughing on you just never know. The good thing about Medway is that if she struggles in maths, she can still cover up and pass if she does well in the other papers.
Just give her all your support and the rest will be based on fate. However practically you may really want to think about the alternatives too. What will you do if she doesnt pass, is there a slightly better comp she could attend? Honestly having no choice is the worst place you can ever be. So perhaps there is something good you may find out about the other comps???.
Its hard Ruby even with the best intentions and all the work sometimes it just doesnt work but do all you can and have a fall back option that you probably dont like.
I also think even if she goes to a comp you will be on a good platform to help her. Having your eldest a year ahead in a grammar you will have an idea about the pace and expectations which you can pass down too. Dont be dishearted now, keep ploughing on you just never know. The good thing about Medway is that if she struggles in maths, she can still cover up and pass if she does well in the other papers.
Impossible is Nothing.
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
As usual lots of good advice ....I would just be repeating what other say.
Just want to say though, unless your child is a complete whizz, I should think all of us have had similar feelings to you.Its still early days.My son didn't have high levels and I was told he wouldn't pass but he did really well.It just suddenly clicked.Teachers/tutors usually can tell if a child " has it " even if sometimes they do score low on particular tests.Maybe the rest of the class got 3 out of 20 and your dd came top!!Mental maths, I think can be affected by things like tiredness ....so I would put that out of your mind.
Have you sat with her and seen how she does on maths, vr etc ? what marks does she get on the books or whatever you are doing ? What is her reading like ? Her times tables? Her interest in other things ?
Are you comparing her to your other child ? My 2nd son will take the 11 plus in 2012 and sometimes I despair and think he is sen ...other times he amazes me.
My ds1 was still having trouble with the coded vr qu in August so try not to worry !
Just want to say though, unless your child is a complete whizz, I should think all of us have had similar feelings to you.Its still early days.My son didn't have high levels and I was told he wouldn't pass but he did really well.It just suddenly clicked.Teachers/tutors usually can tell if a child " has it " even if sometimes they do score low on particular tests.Maybe the rest of the class got 3 out of 20 and your dd came top!!Mental maths, I think can be affected by things like tiredness ....so I would put that out of your mind.
Have you sat with her and seen how she does on maths, vr etc ? what marks does she get on the books or whatever you are doing ? What is her reading like ? Her times tables? Her interest in other things ?
Are you comparing her to your other child ? My 2nd son will take the 11 plus in 2012 and sometimes I despair and think he is sen ...other times he amazes me.
My ds1 was still having trouble with the coded vr qu in August so try not to worry !
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
Now you know you can fix it.rubyhettybetty wrote:I think in our heart of hearts we know DD2 is not going to pass her 11+ - lots of reasons but I really do think so won't get through it. She got 5 out of 20 in mental maths yesterday and maths is supposed to be her best subject! She's year 5.
Just been through something similar with DD, after much investigation the problem was solved.
DD always was a bit of a "finger counter" and had not learnt times tables for instant recall, this was slowing her down. More interestingly one day a week they had SATs style mental maths test which included the key information (numbers) printed on the answer sheet, later in the week the teacher was reading out questions from a higher level book (found a copy on Amazing) and DD couldn't hold all the info. in her head so I trained her to make notes, problem sorted. Have also found that mental maths and NVR are affected by lack of sleep.
So go and fix that mental maths.
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
Ruby, the mental maths thing can often be like that. My DD was 2a at start of Year 5..4a by the end, and 5b in her recent mocks. Her multiplication was awful and her fingers as addition props had me seriously doubting if she would ever move beyond being able to count. I think part of the turning point was turning it into a bit of fun..I bought a few number games, multiplication flash cards and so on, and she suddenly started to enjoy it. In school they do weekly maths competitions, and she is joint lead and has been for over 3 months now..so it can happen very quickly indeed. Don't write her off..children can develop massively in a short period of time, and you could well be pleasantly surprised!
Re: Do you *know* your child isn't really up to it?
i second all the above - i think you will need to do some mental maths or statagies she can use to help with this at home or get a one to one tutor.mm23292 wrote:Ruby, the mental maths thing can often be like that. My DD was 2a at start of Year 5..4a by the end, and 5b in her recent mocks. Her multiplication was awful and her fingers as addition props had me seriously doubting if she would ever move beyond being able to count. I think part of the turning point was turning it into a bit of fun..I bought a few number games, multiplication flash cards and so on, and she suddenly started to enjoy it. In school they do weekly maths competitions, and she is joint lead and has been for over 3 months now..so it can happen very quickly indeed. Don't write her off..children can develop massively in a short period of time, and you could well be pleasantly surprised!