stress mother in bucks

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khanj010
Posts: 239
Joined: Mon Sep 05, 2011 12:01 am

stress mother in bucks

Post by khanj010 »

hi to all the 11+ bucks test takers, my ds will be taking the test in nearly 4 weeks i am getting stressed , counting each day. is it me or is any one else like this. my ds is is trying hard but i am not sure ds will make it! he is scoring about 65/66 in the vr practice test and ds is a jan child. can any one help! as it is my fault as i only started with the practice 6 months ago and he has his heart on the grammer school in bucks
mad?
Posts: 5621
Joined: Thu May 01, 2008 6:27 pm
Location: london

Re: stress mother in bucks

Post by mad? »

Hi khanj010
You might find this current thread useful as it covers your questions and you might be able to offer help to others as well.
http://www.elevenplusexams.co.uk/forum/ ... 1&start=20" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
So it might be less confusing to stick to that thread rather than start another one?
You might also find these threads useful:
http://www.elevenplusexams.co.uk/forum/ ... 12&t=21702" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.elevenplusexams.co.uk/forum/ ... 12&t=21682" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Good luck
mad?
misspiggy
Posts: 70
Joined: Thu Feb 10, 2011 12:50 pm

Re: stress mother in bucks

Post by misspiggy »

Hi Khanj010, I know exactly how you feel, I'm in the same boat. No matter what I do, my DS will ALWAYS get 68 in any practice paper I give him (I'm beginning to wonder if he's doing this on purpose now!). He does a 50 minute paper in 30 minutes and refuses to spend the next 20 minutes checking his answers (this is one major area I'm now having a problem with and no idea how to handle it, I ask him and his response is 'I promise to check my paper in the exam, but not this time'.

My best advice is just keep going and make these last few weeks count and don't let your child know you're stressed. Confidence can do wonders, so build it up in them. I plan to do a couple of easy papers in the last week with my DS or maybe just a bit of 'ticks' on the practice paper where they should'nt be! :P . Self-belief in themselves can never be a bad thing.

He's been working soo hard with me over these past few months and even if he does'nt get through, this whole experience can only be a good thing. For one, he now knows the meaning of hard work, also, he's comfortable working with me and it's done a lot for our relationship (admittedly I feel like I've neglected spending more time with my other 2).

Look at the area's he seems to be weak on. If it's vocab questions, do a list of all the vocab words he does'nt know (this took a long time for me, but I now have it done and we're literally working from this whenever we can..). If it's code questions, just give him code questions to practice on rather than the full papers etc

Keep smiling........keep going :D
Marylou
Posts: 2164
Joined: Sat Feb 25, 2006 2:21 am

Re: stress mother in bucks

Post by Marylou »

My DS is also reluctant to go back and check his work if he has any time left. I've pinpointed the areas where he knows he is weak and more likely to make mistakes, and he has agreed to focus his checking on those rather than just starting at the beginning and working through (after checking for any missing answers, of course!)
Marylou
misspiggy
Posts: 70
Joined: Thu Feb 10, 2011 12:50 pm

Re: stress mother in bucks

Post by misspiggy »

Hi Khanj010, I've just been looking through your past postings, it's quite obvious you are in a panic. I would suggest you do a written plan for yourself listing out what papers/vocab you will cover with your DS on a daily/weekly basis.

What papers have you covered so far? AFN, IPS, Bright Sparks.

Are you working on the vocab with your DS? have you downloaded the list of vocabulary originally posted by Patricia? It is an excellent list, thank you Patricia.

My DS has been working away with me. This whole exercise has been about him showing me he can work hard and learn with me. I made it clear from the outset that it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t get into Grammar school, I will be proud of him no matter what the outcome because I will know he worked hard. I really did not want him to feel a failure if he doesn’t get in, he still has his full life ahead of him and if he's bright enough and is willing to work hard, he'll do it regardless of which school he gets (I went to a terrible performing school -not in Bucks-, got into the local papers for the grades I got and then went on to 'make it' - as some people might think :? ). This is only my opinion of course, but I refuse to place too much emphasis on doing this exam just for a promise of a Grammar school place, I can't have my DS heartbroken or feeling like a failure at the age of 10 if he doesn’t get 121+.

Please can I just suggest that you take a moment out and make a list of papers, question types, vocab that you need to be focussing on for the next 4 weeks? Look at all the words he got wrong in practice papers done at home, go through them with him.

Please forgive me if any of my post comes across as harsh or offends in any way. I really am trying to help you and I have personally found that making a written plan can reduce the stress to some extent and help you focus for the next few weeks.

Thanks Marylou, good to know I'm not alone with him refusing to check his answers!
khanj010
Posts: 239
Joined: Mon Sep 05, 2011 12:01 am

Re: stress mother in bucks

Post by khanj010 »

misspiggy wrote:Hi Khanj010, I've just been looking through your past postings, it's quite obvious you are in a panic. I would suggest you do a written plan for yourself listing out what papers/vocab you will cover with your DS on a daily/weekly basis.

What papers have you covered so far? AFN, IPS, Bright Sparks.

Are you working on the vocab with your DS? have you downloaded the list of vocabulary originally posted by Patricia? It is an excellent list, thank you Patricia.

My DS has been working away with me. This whole exercise has been about him showing me he can work hard and learn with me. I made it clear from the outset that it doesn’t matter if he doesn’t get into Grammar school, I will be proud of him no matter what the outcome because I will know he worked hard. I really did not want him to feel a failure if he doesn’t get in, he still has his full life ahead of him and if he's bright enough and is willing to work hard, he'll do it regardless of which school he gets (I went to a terrible performing school -not in Bucks-, got into the local papers for the grades I got and then went on to 'make it' - as some people might think :? ). This is only my opinion of course, but I refuse to place too much emphasis on doing this exam just for a promise of a Grammar school place, I can't have my DS heartbroken or feeling like a failure at the age of 10 if he doesn’t get 121+.

Please can I just suggest that you take a moment out and make a list of papers, question types, vocab that you need to be focussing on for the next 4 weeks? Look at all the words he got wrong in practice papers done at home, go through them with him.

Please forgive me if any of my post comes across as harsh or offends in any way. I really am trying to help you and I have personally found that making a written plan can reduce the stress to some extent and help you focus for the next few weeks.

Thanks Marylou, good to know I'm not alone with him refusing to check his answers!

thanks for your post misspiggy it was helpful, i have completed all the ips vr test bright sparks book 2 and other afn papers. he still has problems with his vocabularly. especially the words which mean the same and opposite
hedwigsmum
Posts: 27
Joined: Sun Sep 11, 2011 5:55 pm

Re: stress mother in bucks

Post by hedwigsmum »

I'm glad my ds is not the only one. Currently finishing in 30 mins, then doing a cursory check!!
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