detentions - who suffers most?

[drummer]

just got a letter saying my year 10 son has been given a after school detention for " two code of conduct violations" in a week. I called to ask what this meant and these infringements could be failing to get homework diary signed, uniform infringements, being late, chatting/inappropriate behaviour in form time etc

If they get 1 in a week they get a lunchtime detention but twice goes straight to an after-school.

So, who suffers most? Bearing in mind, that an after-school detention is actually a greater burden on me than my son (who goes home on the bus). Instead of getting home at 4.20 he will be in detention til 4.30, when I'l have to go out of my way (dragging his younger siblings with me) to pick him up to get him home for 4.50. Losing 2 or 3 lunch-times would be much more of a punishment for him.

Why not give 1 lunchtime for the first offence and 2 for the second?

[scary mum]

I agree Drummer. DD got an after school detention last term (didn't do some homework that she seemed to be unaware of!!) & I had to negotiate quite hard to get the date moved as she comes home on the school bus and I physically couldn't get there to collect her on that particular day. Maybe they think that if they inconvenience the parents we will come down hard on them and they won't do it again. Unfortunately the detentions often seem to be for fairly trivial things that it's really up to the school to enforce. Don't get me wrong, I fully support the detention system and the pupils looking smart etc, but if I send my DCs out looking smart and they choose to undo their tie/roll their skirt up etc etc on the way to school I can't really police it. Add to that the fact that the rules seems to be completely ignored by some staff and over interpreted by others and the pupils do not get consistent messages.

[drummer]

It is certainly a practice that unfairly penalises the parents of children who live further away from the school (which at 9 miles away is our nearest catchment grammar).

Such families are already hit by the fact that their children are less able to participate in after-school activities from sports and games to homework and revision clubs facilities.

If I could manage it I would have my son stay after school every day for homework club to give him a clear time and place to get homework done.

[scary mum]

If I could manage it I would have my son stay after school every day for homework club to give him a clear time and place to get homework done.

Me too. I think with the current transport proposals we are unlikely to ever get late after school coaches any time soon

[Waiting_For_Godot]

These misdemeanours are not worthy of a detention. Maybe three or four misdemeanours over the course of a week could result in a detention but not one!

[pheasantchick]

It seems a bit steep for a 10 year old.

In a local senior school ( where my son does an evening sports activity), they have a sign up regarding forgetting pe kits.

1 miss = 10 min playtime detention
2 misses = 20 min playtime detention
3 misses = 30 min detention
4 misses = afterschool detention. + parents informed

[drummer]

These misdemeanours are not worthy of a detention. Maybe three or four misdemeanours over the course of a week could result in a detention but not one!

There were 2 in a week 1) forgetting to have his homework diary signed (sometime not an easy thing to accomplish in our very busy household) and 2) was kicking a football (in a corridor or something).

He is actually a good kid, bright and reasonably hard-working.


I reckon it should be one lunchtime for one misdemeanour , 2 lunchtimes for the second in a week and a third could be a whole week of them.

[Looking for help]

I get really annoyed by detentions for failing to have his homework diary signed. My son has my absolute permission to forge my signature for this if we forget to do it - although he is in secondary school.

Persistent refusal to do homework is different, but not at primary school. I would explain to the school that there is no way your 10 year old is doing after school detentions because of the upheaval to the rest of the family. I don't think they can keep him in if you have expressly told them he can't be collected. Suggest to them that if they are so keen to keep him after school, perhaps they could bring him home as well

[scarlett]

I get really annoyed by detentions for failing to have his homework diary signed. My son has my absolute permission to forge my signature for this if we forget to do it - although he is in secondary school

I didn't even realise I had to sign DS homework book until I noticed my signature emblazoned across the pages for the last couple of months. It was actually better then the real thing, so I might choose to adopt it.

[Looking for help]

I didn't even realise I had to sign DS homework book until I noticed my signature emblazoned across the pages for the last couple of months. It was actually better then the real thing, so I might choose to adopt it.

My son does his dad's perfectly, mine is too girly I think.