Rewards ...

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faitaccompli
Posts: 357
Joined: Mon Dec 05, 2011 6:44 pm

Rewards ...

Post by faitaccompli »

Having read on a thread on another forum (yes, I have now become an 11+ forum junkie - it's official) someone offered their child £1000 for passing their 11+ exam.

My son asked for a Kindle (which he got the same day we got the results to make sure he didn't change his mind - purchased with Nectar points from Argos - result!) and £20 from his grandmother and £5 from his aunt. They both knew how hard he had worked over Christmas as we had spent 2 weeks with them over the holidays and he was doing at least an hour a day (with Christmas day off). Oh - and we also took him out for tea at the local Harvester (again, his choice!)

Not sure if I would have approached it differently if we had not received the results a few days after he took the test though. Perhaps a celebratory meal once all the tests were completed would have been in order!

So, what (if anything) did you offer your child as an incentive (or give them as a reward?)

I think that £1k was quite excessive as a bribe - although I suppose if you can afford it and it works, then that is about one month's fees at a mid range independent ...
Last edited by faitaccompli on Wed Feb 22, 2012 2:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reading Mum
Posts: 1841
Joined: Tue Oct 04, 2011 9:44 am
Location: Reading

Re: Rewards ...

Post by Reading Mum »

I won't be offering my DD anything as a reward for passing - it would be awful if she did her best but didn't get into her chosen school or get the reward. That would be rubbing salt in the wound. We will get her something as a surprise for trying hard but it would not be conditional - and it certainly wouldn't be a grand!
faitaccompli
Posts: 357
Joined: Mon Dec 05, 2011 6:44 pm

Re: Rewards ...

Post by faitaccompli »

I agree - mine was offered nothing as an incentive (apart from the chance to go to a great school) - but I would have bought him something afterwards, pass or not pass, as he really did work excessively hard without complaining too much.
scary mum
Posts: 8841
Joined: Mon Mar 15, 2010 3:45 pm

Re: Rewards ...

Post by scary mum »

All of mine got a small treat for working hard towards the exam (two passed, one didn't), and it was given immediately after the test, to link it to the work rather than the result. It was a bit different for you faitaccompli because the two things were so close together! I would never offer an incentive for passing - as long as they try their hardest I am happy (even happier if they do well, but that's between me and the forum :D ).
scary mum
bondgirl
Posts: 802
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2011 11:30 am

Re: Rewards ...

Post by bondgirl »

Ditto. It should be the hard work that is rewarded, not the passing. That said, at DS's request, he does get a pound for getting 100% in Bond papers. Thankfully, the bank balance hasn't been too affected :)
FluffyD
Posts: 347
Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2011 5:22 pm
Location: West Yorks

Re: Rewards ...

Post by FluffyD »

For my DS I have bartered with him and he gets 1000 robux (online game money worth £10) for every 50 points earned while prepping (it will take about a month to get this) His attitude to prep has been awful and it has taken us quite a while to get him used to doing work other than school work and also to working with me. This way, he gets a reward for hard work which is more accesible than waiting until after the exams. He needs the regular focus :lol:

For passing the 11+ I had said that he could have an I-phone (was only going to get him a 2nd hand one and not the latest style, which he was happy with) though he has now said he doesn't want one. Not sure what he will get as a prize for passing but there is def a little something on the cards with a value between £50-£80.

If he gets the £10 a month every month plus the higher value prize, whatever that may be, he will get about £130 worth of prizes all together which I think is more than generous.

I don't want to give him a prize for getting a place as we are out of catchment and he has no control over getting in other than trying his best to pass the test, so if he passes thats enough for me.

£1000 is far to big a prize! :shock:
Vic x
aliportico
Posts: 888
Joined: Wed Aug 01, 2007 12:19 pm

Re: Rewards ...

Post by aliportico »

My parents gave my brother and me £1000 each when he got a scholarship to his London independent at 13 (we were not well off or even particularly comfortable). He'd been top of the waiting list for a scholarship at 11, and they were really trying to get him to put everything into it. He's extremely bright but was rather lazy in those days. I don't actually know if it made any difference to anything he did beforehand! It wouldn't have made any difference to me, because I was always a swotty kid and would have worked as hard as possible anyway.

My kids got a massive well done and a nice meal on the test day :-D
FluffyD
Posts: 347
Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2011 5:22 pm
Location: West Yorks

Re: Rewards ...

Post by FluffyD »

aliportico wrote:My kids got a massive well done and a nice meal on the test day :-D
I think that going for a special meal when all the tests are over is a great idea.
Vic x
andyb
Posts: 645
Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 10:27 am
Location: Buckinghamshire

Re: Rewards ...

Post by andyb »

I am very uncomfortable with the idea of offering a child an expensive present for passing a test. What happens if they fail? Do they get it anyway which sends out the message that it doesn't matter whether you try hard or not, you will still get the reward? Or have they missed out twice - first on the school choice and second on something they had been semi-promised?

Both DS's were given a book that they wanted (approx £10) straight after the last test and before we knew the results. They did not know they would be getting a gift before they sat the tests. It was specifically NOT a reward for passing but a well done for trying their best. We expect both DS's to try their best at whatever they do regardless of their ability or likelihood of success, so bribing them to do their best just seems wrong.
scary mum
Posts: 8841
Joined: Mon Mar 15, 2010 3:45 pm

Re: Rewards ...

Post by scary mum »

But FluffyD, what will you do if he works very hard, and for some reason on the day doesn't pass? Will you give the prize to him anyway? We may have to agree to disagree about this as I am strongly against rewarding results - what do you plan to do for GCSEs? A friend of mine announced that her daughter would get £10 for every A on her report card in junior school (she is very bright). This girl has a brother who is 8 years younger, so I asked my friend what she would do if the brother wasn't an A student. Would he be penalised for not getting As? She agreed that rewarding effort might be the way forward. Having said all that, we all have to do what works for our DCs, and we know them best.

(Sorry, lots of cross-posts, I was answering FluffD's earlier comment about the iphone etc)
scary mum
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