Mock Disappointment

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countrymum
Posts: 686
Joined: Tue Mar 08, 2011 10:16 am

Mock Disappointment

Post by countrymum »

Hi. Hope all is going well in the lead up to many of your DC's taking their exam/s. Wanted to come on and share my feelings about my DD's very disappointing mock result. I dont want to go into facts and figures but judging on the 3 marks would certainly be way off a pass. I really don't know what to do, I really feel I have let her down and am quite upset. We did leave things rather late, her hormones are all over the place so have probably been a bit easy on her, but I feel very deflated. She is such a bright girl ( level 5s in all areas ) top of the class, I instinctively know she would cope and enjoy GS, but this has been a big wake up call that bright children do not pass the 11+ maybe the pressure is just too much for some and 'silly' mistakes are made. I feel very down beat, she was doing well at home in her papers but even her best paper, VR, the mock result was just so disappointing I even wondered if we'd got the right child's results ( wishful thinking ) I was wondering if one or two of you could pick me up a bit and help me feel more positive but with only a short time to go, almost feel like not taking her to exam as although this disappointment shall go, things SHALL feel better, at the time it can feel all consuming and to go through this again for me and her I dont know if is fair on us both.

She feels a bit cross with herself as knows she probably could have put more effort it and wants to just go for it in this last couple of weeks, and I am SO proud she feels this and unlike me in wanting to draw a line under it. Of course this could be the best thing that has happened and just the inputus we need to go for it, what have we got to lose kind of thing. Having spoke to another parent, they were disappointed too, we are kind of hoping may be across the board ( again maybe wishful thinking )

Anyone had a poor mock result ( it was standardised ) and passed. I have to cling onto something....

Good luck to you all x
yummycool
Posts: 148
Joined: Mon Mar 05, 2012 8:55 pm

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by yummycool »

countrymum,

Please don't be hard on yourself. This was just ONE mock. My dd had a very similar experience a few weeks ago. I couldn't believe it - scores will go up and down - they are learning and adjusting their abilities continuously. You have a bright child and deserves to see it through to the end - there's no harm in having a go. I genuinely believe it will be an 'on the day' thing for many of us.

Hang in there - don'g give up - be strong for yourself and your dd :) good luck.
countrymum
Posts: 686
Joined: Tue Mar 08, 2011 10:16 am

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by countrymum »

Hi yummycool,

Thanks you so much for your upbeat words. They have really helped :) I do my very best to keep my feelings very separate and so they dont rub off on her, and why this place is so valuable as I can kind of let it all out here. I am a great believer in rewarding effort and just turning up for the exam and giving it her best shot is more than enough. To pass I think is just the icing in the cake! These mock scores must be reflective in someway of how things may go on the day ( we are not talking just a handful of missed marks ) and I have accepted she probably won't pass, even if only to protect myself a little. I shall of course always be encouraging and give her the confidence that she can achieve anything she puts her mind to.
Guest55
Posts: 16254
Joined: Mon Feb 12, 2007 2:21 pm

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by Guest55 »

Pupils often perform badly in 'mocks' throughout their time in school. Their main function is to practise how it feels to do the exam in a large venue.

Did you get the papers back? If not you must insist they are returned. Look through them and identify any specific areas you can target - question types where some were correct are the easiest to improve.

I have seen massive differences in performance in the 'real' exam - be upbeat as her levels indicate she has the ability!
gatleymum
Posts: 47
Joined: Sat Sep 24, 2011 3:53 pm

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by gatleymum »

I am clinging onto the following logical reasoning:

"AGGS takes top 30% of ability" (so they said on open day!)

+

DD in top 8% of school year (top group of 12 in "outstanding" school)

=

decent chance

I find it hard to believe statistically that the kids in DD's school are miles below average and that somewhere in the area there are hundreds of girls who are miles better - where can these people come from that are going to seriously outperform yours and my DD?

As for the hormones / defeatism, I've got my blinkers on & fingers in ears.. !!
See you a week on Saturday .. :?
UmSusu
Posts: 1015
Joined: Mon Feb 14, 2011 2:42 pm
Location: Birmingham

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by UmSusu »

Countrymum, don't let one set of mock results define how you approach the real exam. If you had not done it you would have done your best right till the very end and then told her that you were proud of how hard she had worked and the rest was no longer in your hands. Rather, it is better to use the mock results to see where she went wrong and whether this is down to technique, time management, nerves or lack of understanding in certain areas. I think some parents might give up after a disappointing result if deep down they knew the child was not up to it anyway - your DD is obviously doing well at school and is a bright child so find out what went wrong.

I will give you the example of my DS: thankfully, he does well all round at school and usually picks things up really quickly . He never liked nvr but he still did well on practice papers at home, but in mocks he was getting appalling results (one of the lowest in a 300 cohort :shock: ). I couldn't understand. It was only when I looked at the papers and discussed it with him in detail that I realised that in the mocks, they would only have 5 or 6 of each type of question and then move on to a different type as opposed to the 12 questions in each section that he practiced at home. He said he would lose time adjusting and then rush everything. So in the last few weeks we focused on this and his marks did improve.

If you know she can do it, don't lose hope! :D

Good luck!

UmSusu
UmSusu
2outof3
Posts: 331
Joined: Tue Apr 21, 2009 3:21 pm

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by 2outof3 »

Countrymum,

I also posted recently about my DC's mock result, which though not terrible, confirmed that a miracle would be required for him to be offered a place in one of the superselective's he is trying for.

Although I was also disappointed, I actually found it a bit of a relief as well. He'd tried his best (or so he says :wink: ) but his best is probably just not going to be good enough. It doesn't mean that he's no longer the bright, wonderful boy he's always been, it just means that out of the 1600 boys who sit these tests, 140 of them are either better drilled or just plain more intelligent than my son.

We're going to keep going though and I think you're right to do so. As many others have said, this could just have been a bad day for your DD (my DS has done a previous mock with a similar result) and who knows what could go right on the day! Keep the faith, but be prepared for whatever result you get. Hopefully you have a good back up secondary.

I know it's all been said before, and I hope I can listen to my own advice, but I really do believe that not "passing" an exam at the age of 10 cannot determine a child's ultimate path in life. There are so many other obstacles and opportunities they will encounter on their way and this is only the start :D
theonly1
Posts: 152
Joined: Fri Sep 09, 2011 11:24 am

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by theonly1 »

Hello countrymum,

I know the feeling as we had this experience with mine at a recent mock test. Even though he passed it was just barely in 2 subjects - Maths & NVR and his VR was excellent. However mock tests are usually more difficult from my experience and I will not knock myself if I were you. Talking about worries and anxieties will help and I am sure that yours will do well. I have sometimes had to deal with my boy's scores going up and down like a yo yo. Our children will succeed, all we have to do now is reassure them. Good luck as all parents surely need this.

Cheers,
theonly1
mystery
Posts: 8927
Joined: Tue Jul 21, 2009 10:56 pm

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by mystery »

What was the mock test? How do you know it had any bearing on the real thing whatsoever? Seems like people pay for these "mocks" just to get a disappointment and no useful information. It sounds like money down the drain to me I'm afraid.
countrymum
Posts: 686
Joined: Tue Mar 08, 2011 10:16 am

Re: Mock Disappointment

Post by countrymum »

Guest55 wrote:Pupils often perform badly in 'mocks' throughout their time in school. Their main function is to practise how it feels to do the exam in a large venue.

Did you get the papers back? If not you must insist they are returned. Look through them and identify any specific areas you can target - question types where some were correct are the easiest to improve.

I have seen massive differences in performance in the 'real' exam - be upbeat as her levels indicate she has the ability!
What wise words, I never even thought of asking for the papers back, duh! Silly me!! Thank you for recommending we do that. Could they say no at all? Have got the husband to get the ball rolling (I feel a bit too emotionally involved right now) on that one, hopefully could get them back today. Thanks too for the encouragement, appreciate it very much.
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