Kind or cruel-KEHS exam prep

[desperate123]

Got a lot of flack for fairly intensive tutoring over summer-however feel justified with dd's score of 261. Going for KEHS was always on the agenda as a back up (local comp not great)-but with dd getting such good result is it worth putting family through another holiday(xmas) of stress?? Also with 2 others coming up through the ranks we would be very wary of such a financial commitment- and- spending 2 days at school doing exams we would hate for her to fall in love with it and then turn round and say no!. Really confused as what to do. All advise gratefully received.

[muminbrum]

We would have only sat KES if DS had done poorly in the KE/HGS exams as we would struggle to afford it and have two younger DC as well. I also don't really agree with private education so it would have to be a last option. DS has done well (although nowhere near you DD's score!) so he won't be sitting it. He hasn't visited KES as like you I didn't want to show him something he couldn't have - I would have taken him to the November open day if he'd been sitting the exam.
I'm not sure what you have to gain by making your DD take it unless you are hoping she will get a scholarship??

[UmSusu]

Even a generous scholarship would require you to make a considerable contribution unless you are entitled for an assisted place too - and they are difficult to come by.

I would say it is only worth going for KES / KEHS when you have scores that should comfortably get your child a place at a grammar if that is actually something you would consider. Otherwise, what is the point?

I agree that you don't want them to love the school only to tell them you can't afford it - these schools are very good at getting everyone to love them!

UmSusu

[mike1880]

If it's a back up then don't bother: you don't need a back up now, but further down the line one of your younger children might.

Mike

[um]

My ds1 and 2 took the KES exam in the days when parents didn't know the Grammar school situation until 1 March.

It wasn't a great experience for us, as neither wanted to revise for the exam (and ds2 refused to so much as pick up a workbook or paper after his 11 Plus), although ds1 really liked KES, and still occasionally moans about not being able to go. The issue about being 'sold' a school is one that may haunt you for many years!

With both of them, there was the issue of going to AP interviews, which, in hindsight, I actually found very stressful.

I wouldn't recommend it, unless, obviously, you have the money (with 5dc we didn't, and the AP system really doesn't take into account family size) or you have genuine reason to believe that your dc will gain a generous scholarship/AP that would enable you to afford it.

Mike1880 is absolutely right about considering younger siblings.
That's why we didn't hesitate to take up CHB for ds1 and 2 because any of the younger 3 children could actually need an Indie place in years to come.

[desperate123]

Having done more research today I found out assisted places were discretionary not automatically calculated on income (thanks UmSusu for pointing that one out!).
Also, I must admit, I had not thought further down the line to ds1 & 2.....I will be thrown out of the Mothers Union....
It all sounds rather stressful and unnessesary this time round-- perhaps this holiday we can just kick back and relax a little.
Thanks everybody for putting it in perspective and for such sound advice-I'm very grateful.