struggling and stressed
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struggling and stressed
My daughter is very stressed out and feels that she is getting left behind at her grammar school. I know they are doing lots of tests at the moment which has probably added to her feeling overwhelmed, but she came home today having got the lowest mark in the class for a test and has been told that she may need to move down a class. She is becoming so despondant and her self esteem is dropping by the day. She was so proud to get in to this school and I am so worried that we may have made the wrong choice. She has made some great friends and is loves the school but is finding the pace really difficult and becoming demotivated and tearful. She was not tutored for 11 plus and seemed to cope well at fist. She has two more tests tomorrow and the results of another. Doing well in just one subject and seems to be rather behind in everything else although I dont really understand ks3 levels. What should they be at this stage of year 7? Can anyone help ? Feeling very alone, just want to see her smiling and relaxed again
Hi Janeyn,
Really sorry to hear that your daughter is becoming stressed at her situation. It seems from your post that the school 'streams' some subjects right from the start. Many schools only stream from the January or Easter of Year7.... when they know the child a bit better.
I wonder whether her peer group (friends) are very high achievers - this could cause her to think that she is not coping.
Have you got a chance to speak to her form tutor and put forward your concerns.
It is such a change for an 11 year old and some take the first couple of terms to properly adjust to a new routine and most probably a higher expectation. Sometimes work at primary school takes little effort, and children need to adapt to not finding it 'easy'.... I know my son did.
A chat with the form tutor might be just the thing to put your daughter at ease as she needs to be positive in her ability.
My sons first report in Yr 7 (Nov) put him at the following levels for the core subjects
Maths 6-, English 4+, Sciences all 5+.... the rest ranged from languages 2's to a couple of 4's and the rest 5's.
Now in Y8 he still struggles with English (and anything else that hasn't got a black/white answer) but is doing well in other subjects.
I hope this helps..
Really sorry to hear that your daughter is becoming stressed at her situation. It seems from your post that the school 'streams' some subjects right from the start. Many schools only stream from the January or Easter of Year7.... when they know the child a bit better.
I wonder whether her peer group (friends) are very high achievers - this could cause her to think that she is not coping.
Have you got a chance to speak to her form tutor and put forward your concerns.
It is such a change for an 11 year old and some take the first couple of terms to properly adjust to a new routine and most probably a higher expectation. Sometimes work at primary school takes little effort, and children need to adapt to not finding it 'easy'.... I know my son did.
A chat with the form tutor might be just the thing to put your daughter at ease as she needs to be positive in her ability.
My sons first report in Yr 7 (Nov) put him at the following levels for the core subjects
Maths 6-, English 4+, Sciences all 5+.... the rest ranged from languages 2's to a couple of 4's and the rest 5's.
Now in Y8 he still struggles with English (and anything else that hasn't got a black/white answer) but is doing well in other subjects.
I hope this helps..
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Hi there,
dont worry, my son is finding harder than he or I thought he would. There are ajustments to be made, new school,new friends, and so on.
I am allowing Christopher the best part of a year, and hope then he feels more at home.
The difficulty is, that having been top in his last school, this is no longer the case, there are many more able children in these selective schools.
Its a longer day, more homework,....this all needs time.
I find I have to, even though I dont want to, push him to do his homework,
three lots a night. My mum always said to me, things always seem worse at night, but better in the morning. Sure, he does feel better when I have
insisted he does his homework, although I would like to let him have a rest
I can see light at the end of the tunnel, hope you will soon see it too.
Cindyx
dont worry, my son is finding harder than he or I thought he would. There are ajustments to be made, new school,new friends, and so on.
I am allowing Christopher the best part of a year, and hope then he feels more at home.
The difficulty is, that having been top in his last school, this is no longer the case, there are many more able children in these selective schools.
Its a longer day, more homework,....this all needs time.
I find I have to, even though I dont want to, push him to do his homework,
three lots a night. My mum always said to me, things always seem worse at night, but better in the morning. Sure, he does feel better when I have
insisted he does his homework, although I would like to let him have a rest
I can see light at the end of the tunnel, hope you will soon see it too.
Cindyx
Thanks for replying. I intend to make appointment for tomorrow with tutor to try and see what support the school can offer. She has done fairly badly in most of the recent tests and even had to retake one as a detention because of poor performance. There were others retaking too who had in fact done worse!. She is not one of the 'high fliers' and that is just fine with me, but she is losing confidence and talking about feeling ' not good enough'. I know she is capable of holding her own but they were put in sets according to 11 plus score which she scored quite highly in, so consequently was put in top set. She was expected to pass but did much better than expected in kent test. Bright but not superbright so really wish they had waited a while before streaming. Tons of homework on top of constant revision for loads of tests.
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I really feel for you and your DD you must try to do what you can to sort it out for her,and give her lots of cuddles and tell her how much you love her.My son was feeling awful too today(he's in Y11) as he'd just got some results back from his mock GCSE'S and didn't do as well as he'd thought he would.Loads of TLC for him tonight,sometimes they just need a boost, and a reminder that they are in a very artificial environment,surrounded by super duper clever people. We expect a lot sometimes,they are only kids ***
Hi again,
In answer to your question regarding SAT's expectations, I just had a look at a website explaining the scores.
Level 1 typical 5year old
2 '" 7year old
3 " 9yearold
4 " 11yearold
5 " 13year old
6 " 14year old
7 " avove 14yrs
apparentely a level 8 is only available in Maths
Hope this helps you
Cindyx
In answer to your question regarding SAT's expectations, I just had a look at a website explaining the scores.
Level 1 typical 5year old
2 '" 7year old
3 " 9yearold
4 " 11yearold
5 " 13year old
6 " 14year old
7 " avove 14yrs
apparentely a level 8 is only available in Maths
Hope this helps you
Cindyx