Boarding School

tipsy · Post by **tipsy** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 8:49 pm

As you may know, my son is at boarding school and I'm due to send my other. I'd be interested to know how kids come out the other end as it is all new to me. Was there any difference, did they do better or worse socially and academically....and most importantly were they less or more close to their parents.

I'd really appreciate posts from parents who've either been through boarding school or have kids who'd finished the process or going through it.

I know its a free forum and lots of people are anti boarding school but I'd prefer constructive comments from those who know the system, thanks.

Ed's mum · Post by **Ed's mum** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 8:50 pm

You probably won't find many who have experience of it.

tipsy · Post by **tipsy** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 8:56 pm

Probably not, but I have some friends who you would call "old money" and can't afford private schools now although they have huge assets. Many are now sending their kids to private school. Is your son going to board? Oh and did you see Rugby on Songs of Praise School Choir competition last Sunday?

tipsy · Post by **tipsy** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 8:57 pm

meant to say sending them to grammar schools so may log on to this site

Ed's mum · Post by **Ed's mum** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:01 pm

Son not boarding, no. He is joining a day house. We live too close (just over 10 miles away). Would not choose boarding though anyway for him, I don't think any of us could cope with that. I am not disrespecting your choices though.
Did see Rugby on SOP. I thought they were a bit deadpan compared with other schools, actually! My guilty secret is that I ALWAYS watch SOP - despite my beliefs!!

tipsy · Post by **tipsy** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:05 pm

I know - very sad. I think they were 2nd out of the 3 in my opinion. Totally understand that you don't want your son to board - its not a decision taken lightly. What is the percentage of boarders there and if he asks to later on, and its affordable, what would you do then? I believe its very common for kids to want to board after a short while.

Ed's mum · Post by **Ed's mum** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:12 pm

80 per cent board at Rugby. It is predominantly a boarding school. He won't board whether he wants to or not. For the first 2 years he is part of a special house which is for day pupils aged 11 to 13. No children board at this age. Most children start Rugby at 13 after the CE exam but each year they take a small amount of children from the state sector and bring them up to CE standard or beyond. Then, at 13, they join the main school. He has already been allocated to the House he will be attached to after the first 2 years - we chose that as it is a Day House. They can do occasional boarding though - at a cost.

Bexley Mum 2 · Post by **Bexley Mum 2** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:31 pm

Tipsy - you do like to submit some controversial posts!!

I have no first hand experience of boarding school. However, I did go to a university that attracted a high percentage of private school students and a few of my friends had been boarders. You may not consider this to be a constructive comment but I did generally find that those people who'd been to boarding school had a veneer of supreme confidence (bordering on arrogance in one or two cases) which often masked some quite serious emotional insecurities. I had a boyfriend who went to Ampleforth and I think it scarred him for life - and he had a very strange relationship with his mother. But then I can't see how sending a child away from his or her parents at such a young age can have anything other than a negative impact.

Do you have a particular reason for sending your children to boarding school rather than a day school nearer home?

zorro · Post by **zorro** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:47 pm

Oh please leave poor Tipsy alone!
My son is about to start school in Sept at a school which has boarders. We only live half an hour away so boarding is not appropriate for us but a friend of ours could only get into Mill Hill School if he took a boarding place (They only live about 40 mins away) They aren't happy but had no option. Sometimes things don't work out as planned and you have to make the best out of a bad job.
People don't send their children to boarding school to get rid of them but to give them a good education.

gloucestermum · Post by **gloucestermum** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 10:02 pm

My ex brother in law boarded at Harrow.He rated it as the worst experience of his life and some of his problems in adult life he thinks were directly attributable to it.I understand parents wanting the best for their children and they are not trying to get rid of them-but in that small boys' mind that's exactly what they were doing.
He also told stories of incidents of extreme bullying because he was seen as not coming from a very wealthy family.
I have no direct experience of boarding and can only tell it how it has been described to me,although the thought of sending my DS away to school is not one I could ever imagine,great education or not!

GM

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