Nerves

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njg
Posts: 42
Joined: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:03 pm

Nerves

Post by njg »

I hadn't realised how nervous my DS was until after a mock test he threw up and was still shaking 2 hours later!
He's not one to talk about his feelings so generally I use my instincts which until now have been quite sharp but I guess this is his first real exam experience.
Not sure how I can help him?
Ambridge
Posts: 374
Joined: Fri Sep 15, 2006 2:46 pm
Location: Bucks

Post by Ambridge »

Sorry to hear about your son - I bet it made you feel awful as well.

When DS did the 12+ he was doing the papers really well and got over 68 out of 80 whenever he practiced and sometimes scored nearly full marks so all I said to him was 'you can do it, you can do any question type they throw at you, there is nothing you can't answer and the only query is how well you pass and we don't care about that anyway'.

Walking into the test he was worried and pale and said his legs felt strange but all I said again was 'you will pass the exam, we know that, just do the same as you have been doing at home'.

I heard him talking to DD the other day and he said he had felt nervous but liked walking into an exam knowing and believing he could do it and when he saw familiar question types he knew he would be ok.

So, I would keep re-iterating to your son that he can do it, has been doing it, there will be no surprises as far as question types go, subtly brainwash him, because it is true, it's one of the few exams where they are familiar with all the types of questions and as long as he controls the timing issues and remembers all the little tips, he can do it.

I know that you have been the 12+ route as well so we wouldn't wish that on any one and they are all very young to be stressing but hopefully by the third practice test, assuming he gets a pass or near a pass in them he will believe he can do it in the real thing.

Good luck

Ambridge x
njg
Posts: 42
Joined: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:03 pm

Post by njg »

Thanks.
My worry is that nerves will affect his performance during the practice tests resulting in poor results thus making him feel even worse during the real thing!!!
I think I shall take a deep breath.....
Ambridge
Posts: 374
Joined: Fri Sep 15, 2006 2:46 pm
Location: Bucks

Post by Ambridge »

If he does do badly in the practice tests, when you analyse where he went wrong, why don't you 'big up' the good marks and then quietly practice the poor areas....

In other words, say he gets mainly vocab wrong, talk about how he got X% of the maths questions correct and over the coming days tell him how you don't even have to concentrate on the maths because he did so well, all that sort of stuff.

My daughter came home yesterday with her first test, she did well but it is hardly the real thing and told me that her friend, who is very bright and the eldest child in the family, got a really poor score which has shocked the whole family as they apparently believed looking through the Familiarisation Pack in the summer hols would be fine.

The dad told her she was useless and has let them all down and didn't speak to her at all. She is heart broken. I felt so tempted to phone and ask if she wanted to come round and do some tests with us in the coming days so the girls can work together etc. but at the end of the day, it's not my problem.

My point is, this dad is an oaf (to put it mildy) :twisted: but so our kids get the correct vibes about sitting the exam, I think we have probably given them all the academic help we can by now, it's a case of they can or they can't - what will be and all that sort of thing.

Whim-sing lyrical as usual, but good, good luck and 'what will be'

Ambridge x
njg
Posts: 42
Joined: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:03 pm

Post by njg »

DS got his mock test result back and got 69 so feels much better. Only managed 65 in familiarisation though (July born) oddly. He did say it felt more 'official' at school which scared him a bit. He felt that 65 was higher than most in the class (of course there's always the 100% kid) so he feels good today and so do I. Long may it last.
patricia
Posts: 2803
Joined: Mon Jan 30, 2006 5:07 pm

Post by patricia »

Dear Njg

Glad your son is feeling better about the testing.

The familarisation is a bit different, one its alot easier and two they are being guided by the teacher.

Children often fall down on the first test A, although easier than the real test, nerves play a great part. Suddenly, its much more 'official'

Patricia
BLANCA
Posts: 144
Joined: Fri Jan 04, 2008 8:58 pm

Post by BLANCA »

as i have given the bucks tests to dd myself, there was no officialness about doing them. She doesnt seem nervous at all really and has enjoyed taking non academic exams in the past.

i'm just wondering, as she has only taken school sats and i'm not sure if that is like an exam or not, is there anything i should do to make practice papers more like the real thing? of course i will talk her through it, but she's my eldest and i never took it so any tips would be great.

Also has anyone got any good non-pasta meal ideas? & should we lay off bread as well?

many thanks
Road Runner
Posts: 410
Joined: Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:32 pm

Mel x

Post by Road Runner »

Hi Njg

Sounds like your son is feeling better about taking the tests which is great.

My dd did her first last week and will have done the second today. It's frustrating as the teacher is not sending them home until after they have done all three tests(the last next week) so we don't know how she's done. She felt last weeks was quite easy and she finished with time to spare. I am expecting her to say she found todays harder as I remember my son having done so and by all accounts it is a harder paper.

Either way we won't know until next week

:evil: aaaaarhhhhh!!
Marylou
Posts: 2164
Joined: Sat Feb 25, 2006 2:21 am

Post by Marylou »

patricia wrote: Children often fall down on the first test A, although easier than the real test, nerves play a great part. Suddenly, its much more 'official'

Patricia
This happened to DD and she said exactly the same about it feeling more like "the real thing" - even though she was doing it at home in exactly the same place as all the other practice papers!
Marylou
njg
Posts: 42
Joined: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:03 pm

Post by njg »

Now I'm worried.
DS came home today having done Fam 1 and said it was easy so he did it twice!!
I hate it when they say it was really hard but I really hate it when they say it was easy.
Fingers crossed the nerves are depleting (is that on the word list!!!).
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