downside of pre-testing
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traceywhyte17
- Posts: 48
- Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2009 12:19 am
- Location: Sunny by the sea
Its a big decision to make about the next 5 years of your DS's life and what suits at 10 or 11 might not suit at 14 so I can understand why you are worried. I am sure you will make the right choice though as you know your own child and you will be thinking about the next 5 years when you are looking at schools even though you might not realise this at the time 
Good luck
Good luck
Pre-testing sounds great for the parent who is absolutely convinced from an early age which school is the right one for their child. But you appear to like to make a decision based on the best possible information available to you - very sensible, and everyone does, to a degree. But this information will change all the time; not only could this be a difficulty in the three year run-in to your child starting at a particular school, it could be an issue during your child's school career as between 13 and 18 they could change so much that the school no longer "fitted" them.
Your decision now depends on how many deposits you are happy losing, and how much uncertainty you want to leave until the last minute.
If you were to make a firm decision now it has to match your decision-making style. So you would have to choose a school which you think would best suit a wide range of personalities and best accommodate the changing child. Also, you would have to be happy that there was a strong home-school partnership so that when any issues arise due to the "fit" of the changing child with the school there is sufficient information and home-school cooperation for you to be able to work the issue through both with the child and the school.
Some schools are not used to parents who want to be highly involved in their child's education (including the social and emotional aspects) and just want to be left to get on with it in their own way, and will only call you in once a big problem has blown up. From all your posts over the last x months I don't think this will suit you, and you may feel tempted to walk away from a school if something like that happened.
On the one hand everyone has a desire to find the ideal school for their child and then just trust and leave them to get on with it. On the other hand everyone also has a desire to keep an eye on what is going on and supplement "weak areas" in some way through experiences that parents can provide outside school, or by working out a joint solution with the school. We all differ as parents on our mix of former and latter. One needs to find a school that suits the parent as much as the child.
Good luck!
Your decision now depends on how many deposits you are happy losing, and how much uncertainty you want to leave until the last minute.
If you were to make a firm decision now it has to match your decision-making style. So you would have to choose a school which you think would best suit a wide range of personalities and best accommodate the changing child. Also, you would have to be happy that there was a strong home-school partnership so that when any issues arise due to the "fit" of the changing child with the school there is sufficient information and home-school cooperation for you to be able to work the issue through both with the child and the school.
Some schools are not used to parents who want to be highly involved in their child's education (including the social and emotional aspects) and just want to be left to get on with it in their own way, and will only call you in once a big problem has blown up. From all your posts over the last x months I don't think this will suit you, and you may feel tempted to walk away from a school if something like that happened.
On the one hand everyone has a desire to find the ideal school for their child and then just trust and leave them to get on with it. On the other hand everyone also has a desire to keep an eye on what is going on and supplement "weak areas" in some way through experiences that parents can provide outside school, or by working out a joint solution with the school. We all differ as parents on our mix of former and latter. One needs to find a school that suits the parent as much as the child.
Good luck!
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T.i.p.s.y
If there had only been two schools and the scores were 23 and 22 I'd still think that 1 point wouldn't be a sensible way to pick a school. Ah but it could be that all three are good choices for you, and it does not really matter which.
Or it could be that all three are poor choices for you (what is the maximum score you could have awarded a school and might you find a school that would score higher than the three you have evaluated?)
Or it might be that you have used some criteria that are not important to you, or missed out some criteria that are important to you.
If it's the first, then any final decision method will now do - e.g. dip dip doo, the cat's got the flu', the dog's got the chicken pox and out goes you.
If it's one of the last two possibilities, then more work required!!
Or it could be that all three are poor choices for you (what is the maximum score you could have awarded a school and might you find a school that would score higher than the three you have evaluated?)
Or it might be that you have used some criteria that are not important to you, or missed out some criteria that are important to you.
If it's the first, then any final decision method will now do - e.g. dip dip doo, the cat's got the flu', the dog's got the chicken pox and out goes you.
If it's one of the last two possibilities, then more work required!!
Don't mean to sound flippant, but it reminds me of how when a friend of mine was trying to decide between (only 2! ) boyfriends some years back and came up with similar results on a scoring basis. Needless to say she was bowled over by a third person who scored nowhere near all on the points system (flat in Chelsea, animal lover etc 
)...
When you and your DS have visited the schools what was your gut reaction?
Have to admit we just 'felt' one school was better than another for our child (and us - good point Perplexed!). Not to say others would have been fine when he was there, but it felt like putting on slippers after a day of wearing high heels. We like the head, and the 'interview' with him was a very natural, easy conversation. same when we bought this house, and a previous dwelling - somehow just 'felt' right.
I hired a babysitter who I did not feel right about, but put it down to my unreasonable prejudice re her appearance and speech, as by all objectrive criteria she was fine - impeccable credentials. She let me down in a bad way by just not turning up to collect the children one day from school as Wimbledon was on TV...
Since then have gone with gut reaction over objective criteria!!!
Probably no help - sorry!!
)...When you and your DS have visited the schools what was your gut reaction?
Have to admit we just 'felt' one school was better than another for our child (and us - good point Perplexed!). Not to say others would have been fine when he was there, but it felt like putting on slippers after a day of wearing high heels. We like the head, and the 'interview' with him was a very natural, easy conversation. same when we bought this house, and a previous dwelling - somehow just 'felt' right.
I hired a babysitter who I did not feel right about, but put it down to my unreasonable prejudice re her appearance and speech, as by all objectrive criteria she was fine - impeccable credentials. She let me down in a bad way by just not turning up to collect the children one day from school as Wimbledon was on TV...
Since then have gone with gut reaction over objective criteria!!!Probably no help - sorry!!
Best Regards,
Thea
Thea
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T.i.p.s.y
I understand the gut reaction theory but for some reason it doesn't seem to work in my case! 
The prep school my kids are at now I bypassed twice because I felt nothing for it, but it is the most wonderful environment. I didn't get any wow factor with E or W and felt the same when I went round them both. My issue is more that there are slight risks with each. Send him to W and he may become even more of a boffin, send him to E and it may be too robust for him. I haven't found one school that is inbetween that will cater for him academically or I'd have ruled them out by now.
The prep school my kids are at now I bypassed twice because I felt nothing for it, but it is the most wonderful environment. I didn't get any wow factor with E or W and felt the same when I went round them both. My issue is more that there are slight risks with each. Send him to W and he may become even more of a boffin, send him to E and it may be too robust for him. I haven't found one school that is inbetween that will cater for him academically or I'd have ruled them out by now.